Don’t Let Holiday Stress Freak You Out

posted 26th November 2008    Written by: Molly Mahar    CATEGORY: All Posts, Molly, Tips & Tools

It’s the holiday paradox: In this time of festivities– why do so many of us feel stressed out?  Shouldn’t we be enjoying the extra days off of work, spending time with loved ones & traditions steeped in good memories?

In my case, the Big Man has left me with his family while he’s off fishing for two days.  I’ve had some delicious green chile, taken a beautiful drive to Georgia O’Keefe’s Ghost Ranch, been homesick for my own family, done a little Christmas shopping, been bitten by a scary dog (I suppose it was more of a nip, since I just have a few tiny teeth bruises on my butt, but still–I don’t know the last time I actually screamed!) & taken some beautiful photos.

And yes, I’m a bit stressed by all of it.

I imagine that many of you are in the same boat.  In the spirit of generosity and good cheer, I’ve been testing some stress busting holiday tips for you with varying rates of success.  The following are the all stars that have left me calm, cool & collected.

1. Breathe. Sounds simple enough, but in the midst of embarrassing story reminiscing or arguing over the correct ingredient ratio, we’re quick to jump on the defense.  When you feel the skin on the back of your neck rising or your face flushing, put your hand on your belly and take a deep breath.  Feel the breath filling your belly as it gently pushes your hand out & then exhale through your nose.  You can even say to yourself, “Calm In” when inhaling & “Anger out” when exhaling.  Breathing like this forces you to slow down in the present moment.

It grounds me every time and gives me a few moments to make a conscious choice about what I say or do next.

2. Remember the Point. I love being right.  I like making my opinions known loud and clear.  I like my choice of ice cream flavor/tablecloth/time of departure to be the winner.  Etc, Etc, Etc.  Day-to-day this doesn’t pose too many problems, but in the midst of 15 others, wanting your way can be an extreme hindrance.  The point of getting together with family and friends over the holidays is to enjoy their company. Not to be right. Work on compromising, selfless giving or expanding your own horizons.

You can go back to doing things your way in a few days, but being flexible and open will go a long way to reducing your holiday stress.

3. Give up on Perfect. This one usually falls on the shoulders of the hostess.  You know what I’m talking about:  you strive for a beautifully set table, soap in your guest’s initials welcoming them to the bath, your killer pecan pie timed to perfection with the fresh brewing coffee, matching candlesticks or whatever tiny detail you believe the perfect Thanksgiving dinner depends upon. Give it up!  Ask for help, don’t take things so seriously & dig in.  Enjoy the fruits of your hard work, instead of obsessing over small details that truly don’t matter.

I promise no one will notice that your candlesticks don’t match.

That said, I’m wishing everyone a joyous holiday.  Don’t let stress ruin your long weekend! Remember the spirit of the holiday and give thanks for all the things in your life for which you are grateful.

photo credit: Dave-F

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