Craving Something… Anything… Meaningful

posted 13th July 2009    Written by: Robyn    CATEGORY: All Posts, Quarterlife Crisis

INTRODUCING ROBYN

This is how I got to where I am…

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Come along for the rest of the ride!

Being a natural-born planner and a self-defined overachiever, I believe my Quarterlife Crisis began early—at age 22.  I had graduated college with a journalism degree and a women’s studies degree (don’t ask me what I planned on doing with this, because I have no answer).  I immediately packed up my bedroom at my parents’ house and moved to downtown Chicago, living right in the heart of Lakeview in a gorgeous Victorian 3-flat.

I interviewed relentlessly, and I landed a job as a supply-chain-something-or-other at Kellogg Company.  I began the job with a shining attitude—I arrived early, I dressed up, I left late, I conversed with my coworkers. I had a dreadful one hour commute to and from work everyday (think opening traffic jam scene of Office Space) that eventually weighed on me by day #6.

My lack of stimulating work also started weighing on me. I spent most of my time zoning out in front of excel sheets and taking long lunch breaks—sometimes to my car where I could nap in my backseat (sad, pathetic…funny looking back at it).

Being unchallenged and unmotivated, I questioned whether this is what my work life would be like…and if it was…damn…I needed more time to have fun before settling down with this.

After three months, I realized all my planning and over-achieving had gotten me nowhere.  I quit my job, dropped my lease in Chicago and bought a flight to Sydney, Australia. I backpacked up the East Coast of Australia.  I did things I never thought I’d do: learned to surf, kayaked with dolphins, sailed the wide open ocean, snorkeled with jelly fish (eek!), camped on a deserted island, went white water rafting, and of course, made friends with kangaroos and koalas.

I was on a roll!  I couldn’t get enough, so I went over to New Zealand to go black water rafting through caves, hike on glaciers, and chicken out on bungee jumping.

I returned to Chicago three months later, completely revived with fresh ideas.  I felt like a new person–less concerned with structure and planning and more concerned with just “seeing what happens” and “going with the flow.” Slowly, I fell back into the pattern that society demands…I began the job hunt again–this time believing I knew more about what i was looking for, but found that all I could think about was how huge the world was and how little I had seen.

I was now stuck with a travel bug that would haunt me during my next job.

I received an offer to work at a marketing firm downtown with a salary bigger than I ever imagined starting with.  I immediately decided I would love the job and decided to buy a condo and settle down in Chicago, subconsciously knowing I needed an anchor to keep me still.

Whenever I daydreamed about exploring the world, I pushed it to the back of my mind and told myself, “Now you are working for a global company.  If you put in your time now…I bet you can work anywhere in the world!”  Some how I managed to lie to myself and make myself believe—there’s talent!

This brings me to my current point in life.

I am now working a job that takes up the majority of my time and manages to leave me unfulfilled and unchallenged no matter what kind of work I request.  I crave something—anything meaningful.  I crave a challenge, and most of all, (If this is what the corporate world is like) I crave calling my own shots and not answering to “the man.” I am on the verge of quitting my job, trying to sell my condo, possibly going back to school, and possibly starting my own business.

I expect hiccups along the way, but I’m up for the challenge—obviously!

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