Choosing the Nontraditional Path

posted 20th August 2009    Written by: Marisa    CATEGORY: All Posts, Job/Career/Work, Marisa, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

Books(This week I posed a question to Andrea, Kendra, Robyn & Marisa- When you were small, what did you want to be when you grew up?  How has this played into your life?  And perhaps the more appropriate question for a Quarterlife Crisis: What do you want to be when you grow up? xoxo  Molly)

I had the lineage of the Presidency memorized when I was 13. I even knew all of the First Ladies. I knew their terms of service, certain unique facts about both people and info about their pets.

I know, NERD ALERT.

I was teased, yes, but that was middle school and I hope I’m not the only who thought those years were shit because let’s face it, they were.

At that time I wanted to be the first female President but this was before I discovered 18th & 19th century British Literature, Film and Art. I found an identity in Literature growing up–a bond to this day that hasn’t been broken. Now I don’t necessarily want to be a professional writer per se.  It was the literature, the characters, the vernacular and the way authors used the English language that captured my imagination and helped me to escape into eras, decades, and different worlds. It’s why I studied English Lit. for my B.A. and why I literally live in a house of books.

I didn’t really have any concrete career ambitions as child; I wanted to be my New Mexican/Tex-Mex Barbie that my parents bought since it was the only one that was Hispanic and had long black hair like me. I wasn’t quite sure what being a Barbie entailed while being six years old, but I knew I loved her clothes and that was enough for me.

It wasn’t until I saw Moulin Rouge that I had my first real career dream. I wanted to be a costume designer. I researched everything about that film including Catherine Martin (costume designer and wife to BRILLIANT director, Baz Lurhmann) and her efforts to create such a fantastic and amazing reality with clothes. I researched schools, programs and started costume projects. I worked at JoAnn’s Fabrics at the time and took full advantage of my employee discount and subsequently became broke with every paycheck.

So why am I not a costume designer right now?

That’s an easy one. I used to be someone who didn’t really believe in “dreams”. I had them, sure…  I just didn’t think they were obtainable. I grew up with a practical, traditional way of looking at things. Life as my parents defined it didn’t really leave room for “dreams”.

Practical Path: Go to school, finish school with a practical degree, get job with said finished school degree, and stay with job. Work at job, get married, have kids, yada yada yada.

I don’t prescribe to that way of thinking anymore.

Since encountering my Quarterlife Crisis, I live my life with a different train of thought. My expectations are completely different now.

I expect to live my life with happiness, maybe with a new career, maybe with new people, who knows…  I have many interests and passions that could make me happy doing almost anything now.  I think I could be happy with many paths.

Growing up with such a defined or basic view of a life-path played into who I was at school and how I treated my life.  Now? I’ve accepted the nontraditional path since I know I can’t control everything and will never be able to.

What do I want to be now… good question!  It’s a Catch 22 of sorts. I have an opportunity to do anything I really want and I’ve taken advantage of that to an extent. I have no serious commitments, am totally mobile and have few responsibilities. I am, however, stuck in unemployment for the moment during a recession where I get one phone call for every 50 or so jobs I apply for now.

I’ve deduced something very important during this Quarterlife crisis. I want to be happy. This is my first and far most important priority during this journey. I can work anywhere really in order to pay the bills, but as long as I keep happiness a priority, I’ll be able to excel in my passions and interests and keep and create new career opportunities.

It’s all about being positive I’ve found out….  Otherwise, why waste the effort?

marisa-bio1

photo credit: 2fs

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