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First Step: Simplify

posted 24th August 2009    Written by: Robyn    CATEGORY: All Posts, Job/Career/Work, Quarterlife Crisis, Robyn, Season 1

RamenMy freelance work is picking up, and I’m preparing for my transition from my 9 to 5 to working for myself.

Right now, life is hard… Trying to balance all the work is a little difficult, but once I have the 9 to 5 off my back, I think I will have a nice pace going.

When I first decided to work for myself, I imagined living on Ramen noodles and tap water and being forced to rent out a corner of my tiny condo in order to make ends meet. However, I created a budget to see what my real expenses were and how much money I truly needed to make in order to keep living the life I do.

It was eye-opening to see how I spend my money, and I encourage everyone to do this.

Not only did I realize that I spend way too much money at Dunkin Donuts and Ebay.com (who can resist all the cheap crap on there?!), but I also realized that I really don’t need to make a lot of money to keep living the fabulous life I currently live.

Once I had brought this to my own attention, I reconsidered the whole “live to work or work to live” idea. For the past year and a half, I have put myself through hell, thinking that I had to make all this money to pay my mortgage and buy groceries and put money away in savings (ie: living to work and placing all value on money and the material items it brought me).

Once I start working for myself, I will be working just to live. I don’t need much to be happy. I still need to pay my mortgage and buy groceries, treat myself to a nice dinner out with friends, spend a little too much on a night out, and, of course, it’s always nice to have some backup savings…

But that’s about it.

What led me to this revelation?  I thought back to the time two years ago, right before I left to go traveling.  I was living in an awesome place in Chicago, I was saving to go travel for three months, and I was still going out and enjoying Chicago on the weekends…   AND not eating Ramen.  Do you know what I was making two years ago?  I was a full-time intern making $12 an hour and a part-time waitress.  Regardless, I was living large!

I’m not sure when I changed my mindset and thought I needed a bigger salary and a fancier job title in order to be happy, but I am changing my mindset again and going back to my previous thought process.

My first step to getting back there?  Simplify.

This past week, I have spent a lot of time “de-cluttering” my life.  I cleaned out my closets and cleaned off my shelves.  I donated a lot of stuff, and I sold some stuff—eliminating about three stuffed garbage bags full of clothes, books, and miscellaneous crap.

It felt good.

My place is cleaner, I have more space, and I feel refreshed.  I didn’t need any of that stuff…  And now I am closer to traveling again—less stuff to worry about putting in storage!

robyn-bio1

photo credit: pinprick

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Giveaway Winners

posted 22nd August 2009    Written by: Molly Hoyne    CATEGORY: All Posts, Molly, Stratejoy the Biz

Did you win?  I don’t want to ruin the suspense by listing the winners here, so watch the video!

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Choosing the Nontraditional Path

posted 20th August 2009    Written by: Marisa    CATEGORY: All Posts, Job/Career/Work, Marisa, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

Books(This week I posed a question to Andrea, Kendra, Robyn & Marisa- When you were small, what did you want to be when you grew up?  How has this played into your life?  And perhaps the more appropriate question for a Quarterlife Crisis: What do you want to be when you grow up? xoxo  Molly)

I had the lineage of the Presidency memorized when I was 13. I even knew all of the First Ladies. I knew their terms of service, certain unique facts about both people and info about their pets.

I know, NERD ALERT.

I was teased, yes, but that was middle school and I hope I’m not the only who thought those years were shit because let’s face it, they were.

At that time I wanted to be the first female President but this was before I discovered 18th & 19th century British Literature, Film and Art. I found an identity in Literature growing up–a bond to this day that hasn’t been broken. Now I don’t necessarily want to be a professional writer per se.  It was the literature, the characters, the vernacular and the way authors used the English language that captured my imagination and helped me to escape into eras, decades, and different worlds. It’s why I studied English Lit. for my B.A. and why I literally live in a house of books.

I didn’t really have any concrete career ambitions as child; I wanted to be my New Mexican/Tex-Mex Barbie that my parents bought since it was the only one that was Hispanic and had long black hair like me. I wasn’t quite sure what being a Barbie entailed while being six years old, but I knew I loved her clothes and that was enough for me.

It wasn’t until I saw Moulin Rouge that I had my first real career dream. I wanted to be a costume designer. I researched everything about that film including Catherine Martin (costume designer and wife to BRILLIANT director, Baz Lurhmann) and her efforts to create such a fantastic and amazing reality with clothes. I researched schools, programs and started costume projects. I worked at JoAnn’s Fabrics at the time and took full advantage of my employee discount and subsequently became broke with every paycheck.

So why am I not a costume designer right now?

That’s an easy one. I used to be someone who didn’t really believe in “dreams”. I had them, sure…  I just didn’t think they were obtainable. I grew up with a practical, traditional way of looking at things. Life as my parents defined it didn’t really leave room for “dreams”.

Practical Path: Go to school, finish school with a practical degree, get job with said finished school degree, and stay with job. Work at job, get married, have kids, yada yada yada.

I don’t prescribe to that way of thinking anymore.

Since encountering my Quarterlife Crisis, I live my life with a different train of thought. My expectations are completely different now.

I expect to live my life with happiness, maybe with a new career, maybe with new people, who knows…  I have many interests and passions that could make me happy doing almost anything now.  I think I could be happy with many paths.

Growing up with such a defined or basic view of a life-path played into who I was at school and how I treated my life.  Now? I’ve accepted the nontraditional path since I know I can’t control everything and will never be able to.

What do I want to be now… good question!  It’s a Catch 22 of sorts. I have an opportunity to do anything I really want and I’ve taken advantage of that to an extent. I have no serious commitments, am totally mobile and have few responsibilities. I am, however, stuck in unemployment for the moment during a recession where I get one phone call for every 50 or so jobs I apply for now.

I’ve deduced something very important during this Quarterlife crisis. I want to be happy. This is my first and far most important priority during this journey. I can work anywhere really in order to pay the bills, but as long as I keep happiness a priority, I’ll be able to excel in my passions and interests and keep and create new career opportunities.

It’s all about being positive I’ve found out….  Otherwise, why waste the effort?

marisa-bio1

photo credit: 2fs

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I Want to Like my Job

posted 19th August 2009    Written by: Robyn    CATEGORY: All Posts, Job/Career/Work, Quarterlife Crisis, Robyn, Season 1

Robinandsis

(This week I posed a question to Andrea, Kendra, Robyn & Marisa- When you were small, what did you want to be when you grew up?  How has this played into your life?  And perhaps the more appropriate question for a Quarterlife Crisis: What do you want to be when you grow up? xoxo  Molly)

When I was growing up, I played “house” with my two younger sisters constantly. I was always the more practical of my sisters: Holly wanted to be a Dutch girl when she grew up so that she could always wear wooden shoes and Alex wanted to be a dolphin trainer so that she could meet Flipper.

When we played house, I was always the “Mom” and surprisingly, I balanced two jobs on top of that. I was a 9-year-old mom-doctor-artist. Pretty impressive, right? I was a creative kid who loved helping others, so mom-doctor-artist was the perfect profession for me.  Back then, I was only concerned with three simple things that I “like to do”:

Being happy
Drawing
Helping people

Now…  I am not an artist nor a doctor. I can draw nothing other than stick figures, and I faint at the site of blood, so it really wouldn’t have worked out anyway.

I am, however, still searching for something that I just plain “like to do.”

And I want that to be my job.

Over the years, I have wanted to be a restaurant owner, a high level businesswoman, a traveling journalist, a teacher, a counselor, and…  the list goes on and on. I think I have been searching for my niche for a very long time and hoping that eventually it will just find me.

I have given different occupations a chance, but I lose interest quickly when I feel like my skills aren’t used and my talent is underestimated. I’ve also really started to pay attention to how quickly time moves.  I feel like I am still a “recent college grad,” when really I’ve been a professional (well…kinda!) for the past three years.

Point is… Time flies and life really is what happens while you are sitting there making plans.

I have reached the conclusion that I will never enjoy a corporate job. I will never enjoy a 9 to 5, because there is too much living left to do! I can’t do that cramped in a cubicle, doing mindless work. I’m looking for a job that doesn’t seem so much like work.

cubicle

I also think I do need something of my own so that I can only answer to myself due to my severe aversion of doing bitch work for “the man.” I know I’m better than that, and if no one else will take advantage of my true skills (not my data entry or copying skills), then I’ll work for myself and pat myself on the back!

I’m working on getting the courage to leave my secure job and take a chance, but it’s scary to take that kind of a chance.  I’m confident in my skills, but I need an idea…a plan…  More on that later, I promise!

robyn-bio1

photo credit: stewf

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When I Grow Up, I’ll Be Happy

posted 18th August 2009    Written by: Kendra    CATEGORY: All Posts, Job/Career/Work, Kendra, Life Lesson, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

nogrownups(This week I posed a question to Andrea, Kendra, Robyn & Marisa- When you were small, what did you want to be when you grew up?  How has this played into your life?  And perhaps the more appropriate question for a Quarterlife Crisis: What do you want to be when you grow up? xoxo  Molly)

Adults love to ask little kids what they want to be when they grow up.

It is a strange tendency, if you think about it. Small children can’t even come close to being able to express a clear answer based on skills, interests, temperament and professional knowledge.  Heck, even most adults can’t.

Adults, I think, ask this question for one of two reasons.

The first, and the more insidious, is because in our “success” oriented culture we want kids to start thinking about their futures early. While this has its benefits, it’s also a form of social conditioning that trains us to be still more future focused. We forget early how to embrace the moment and instead keep our eyes on the carrots held by society’s sticks.

The second reason I think adults enjoy asking little kids what they want to be when they grow up is because children often respond with some of the cleverest, funniest, most interesting answers to what we as adults often find a weighted question. 

littlekendraWhen I was a kid I wanted to be (in order from youngest to oldest): a doctor, a lawyer, president of the United States and a superhero. The older I got, oddly enough, the more fantastical my career aspirations became.

I remember fervently praying to god in French class, my sophomore year of high school, for super powers, or at the very least, the ability to create my own bat cave with the necessary technologies. I was a bizarrely spiritual kid with a strong attraction to the mystical side of the Catholic faith in which I was raised.

This is my explanation, fifteen years later, as to how I could possibly believe that God would give me super powers.Faced with transubstantiation and the dead rising, how hard could a little thing like super powers be? I promised to keep them a secret.

I wanted super powers because for as far back as I can remember I was aware of human suffering and desperately wanted to end it. Given the vastness of the situation- environmental degradation, hunger, poverty, war- I quickly realized that it would take super human efforts to fix the problem. And while fifteen years later, I no longer pray to God for superpowers to help me fix the problem, this strong desire to make the world better has played a role in both my career and personal life.

Beyond my graduate school studies in sustainable development and my decision to pursue a career, in part, in environmental policy, I’ve found that I have a difficult time relating to people who don’t seem to recognize the connections between their life choices and the larger problems of the world. My friends and “special friends” all tend to be motivated by more than money or interests, but also by a larger sense of connection to people and the planet.

What does that mean as I face once again the question of who I want to be when I grow up?

Beyond helping to color the kinds of activities I’m willing to engage in, not much. I’m more motivated these days by the sentiment represented in this quote:

“When I was in grade school, they told me to write down what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down happy. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment. I told them they didn’t understand life.”

More than anything, what I want to be when I grow up is happy.

Not the kind of happiness that’s represented in television commercials by an endless parade of smiles, and writhing hips, set to a kicking soundtrack…  Rather, a deeper sense of contentment based on strong connections to loved ones, to my work, and to society as a whole.

This is why I am actively seeking work that I find personally meaningful that also contributes to society and why I am moving home to be closer to family and friends.

kendra-bio1

photocredit: eatbitter

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