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I Can’t be a Rockette when I Grow Up

posted 17th August 2009 Written by: Andrea CATEGORY: All Posts, Andrea, Job/Career/Work, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

(This week I posed a question to Andrea, Kendra, Robyn & Marisa- When you were small, what did you want to be when you grew up? How has this played into your life? And perhaps the more appropriate question for a Quarterlife Crisis: What do you want to be when you grow up? xoxo Molly)

I am 25 and have no idea what I want to be when I grow up. Now, I have said this before and I’ll say it again: I really thought when I was little by the time I was 25 I would be a grown up.

Not so much.

My roommate Siobhan recently sent me this amazing YouTube video and it pretty much sums up how I feel about my life on a daily basis. I know there are other girls out there who feel the same way! I probably watch this video 5 times each and every day now. At least!

When it come down to it, I don’t think men and women living today in Generation Y can really classify themselves in one career field. It isn’t like when our parents were younger and they dreamed of becoming an Astronaut or Dentist or Teacher. People our age go through so many different types of careers and many people (myself included) have multiple jobs at one time.

What do I consider myself? Well, I’m a writer first and foremost. And even though I have not taken a dance class is over a year, I still consider myself a dancer. I knew how to dance before I knew how to read. It makes me sad to say that today I don’t dance as my career.

It is so ironic that my first performance, when I was 4, was to a song called “When I Grow Up.” From that point on, I was convinced I was destined to be a dancer. I am the only one in my family who has ever taken dance lessons. When I was 6, I was chosen out of many students at my studio to join the competition team and I stayed on that time until I graduated high school. Up until the age of 11, I thought I was going to be a dancer. Then I found out there was a height requirement to become a Rockette. (I have not grown taller since I was 11 and I am just 4 1/2 inches shy of the 5’6’’ requirement to dance at Radio City…)

I then thought, “Okay, well if I can dance, then I could teach!” I even interviewed my dance teachers, who are like aunts to me, for my 6^th grade Career Studies class.

Here and there I swayed from that path, but only for a few days. Once I thought I could maybe be an architect since I love unique design and buildings, but then I would remember how much I hate math and went back to my dance teacher dream.

It wasn’t until the end of high school that I had to really sit down and decide if my career would involve dance or not. Aka… I had to decide if I was going to go to college for dance or for something else. That something else was another passion of mine, something I had done equally as long: writing.

I ended up choosing the latter. Honestly, I did it because by the time I was 18 I knew I wasn’t as good or talented dancer as I once had been. When I was 6-10 yrs old I would like to think I was a very talented dancer for my age, but as I got older dance became a very commercialized activity and I realized my talent was nothing compared to others. It wasn’t fun anymore, instead it was cutthroat and competitive.

I became a journalism major and subsequently graduated with an Honors degree in journalism, mass communication and marketing. During my 4 years in school, my brain ran through about a dozen different careers. These are some of them:

Newspaper editor
Magazine feature writer
College website developer
Service learning coordinator (Service Learning is a new educational initiative connecting service or volunteerism within a particular community to higher education curriculum.)
Private school marketing director
Events coordinator for non-profits
Public Relations coordinator for culture/theater/dance venue

When the time came, I applied for jobs in Public Relations at a few theater companies and small more feature-y newspapers and magazines. No dice.

I actually ended up going to graduate school, living at home with my family and working at a non-profit that helps developmentally disabled individuals. It was one of the most rewarding experiences of my life and I’m glad I decided to work in non-profit prior to any real-world corporate gig. (Most people I have found go the other way. They work in corporate America first, realize how much it sucks and then go work someplace that actually helps people.)

Lately my thoughts on career choice have been all over the place! Over the past 6 months I have thought about:

1. Traveling the world as a paid blogger
2. Teaching New Media at a medium-sized college or university
3. Opening a Bed & Breakfast
4. Starting my own new media consulting business (I am doing this one!)
5. Getting a corporate America desk job at a Social Media firm

Those are just five among many many other things. It’s not that I am not satisfied with my job right now, I just have this syndrome (which I acquired from my Dad) that nothing is ever good enough. I feel like I could be doing more with my life.

I look around at all those 25-year-old grown ups with families and houses and career and think… “When will I grow up? And what will I be?”

Will I travel the world or live overseas? Will I ever teach? Will I work in corporate America ever? I really don’t know. I may never know. But, I think that the majority of my life is going to spent trying to figure this out. My life job is going to be searching for my purpose on this earth… And I’m okay with that.

I’m okay with that as long as I am happy and calm that is!

*The very last performance I ever did with my studio back in Buffalo was a 20 year Anniversary tribute to our instructors. I have danced with most of these girls in this picture for 20 years and this routine was a parody of the very first dance we ever performed…. “When I Grow Up”

Habitual Happiness Giveaway

posted 14th August 2009 Written by: Molly Mahar CATEGORY: All Posts, Molly, Stratejoy the Biz

We’re hosting a giveaway!

a Habitual Happiness Giveaway

Here’s the Deal: I want to help you make happiness a habit.

And we’ve got three fabulous gifts that will help you do just that. They’ll help you begin to carve out the road to happiness and success on your own terms; your own personal rockstar life… Read on to find out what I’m giving away and how to enter!

The cow picture has nothing to do with the giveaway. It just makes me giggle. And that makes me happy!

The Goodies:

Style Statement: Live by Your Own Design

Style Statement is one of my favorite books. Carrie & Danielle’s philosophy is right in line with my own — the secrets to your authentically joyous life lie within you and only you. It’s up to you to tune in and recognize what you truly love, and how that can help you live an authentically joyous life. This book is “part workbook, part inspirational narrative,” and all beautiful. You’ll be inspired by what’s inside, especially after you’ve filled in your own details!

STYLE STATEMENT is an inspiring take on the power of style and authenticity. [The book] presents a series of inquiries that lead readers to the personal words that guide the spirit, look and feel of their life. Via Carrie and Danielle’s Lifestyle Map, readers then explore how their own unique Style Statement can generate momentum in every area of their life.

Want to know more? Take a look at the video below where Carrie and Danielle talk about their book and the feedback they’ve received about the Style Statement process.

Props to Carrie and Danielle on Vimeo.

(Clarification for those who want the entire scoop: Carrie and Danielle as a rockin’ business duo have since broken up, but you will find Carrie’s new site: Style Statement and Danielle’s blog: White Hot Truth alive and well and inspiring as ever.)

$50 off a Stratejoy Course

You can apply the $50 gift card to either Stratejoy‘s in-person Lifestyle Design course here in Seattle or to The Joy Equation, our 30-day online course. That’s a 20-33% savings! The courses are designed to give you the time, tips, and resources you need to recognize your own awesomeness, define your version of success, and build a plan to claiming your happiness. Life’s too short to feel stuck, bored or unhappy. Here’s what one participant had to say about it:

… By taking the time to actually define my core values, my own vision of success, and what I truly wanted, I realized that happiness was something I could start working on now …

Molly doesn’t tell you how to live your life. She simply gives you the tools and resources that will help you do that for yourself. Everyone’s version of what success or happiness looks like is different, so the last thing we need is someone telling us what they are — Molly helps YOU figure it all out on your own terms.

And that’s what I love about the workshop and about Stratejoy. No pressure, just tips, tricks, motivation and accountability. The good stuff.

Want to know more?

Click here to find out more about Lifestyle Design.

Click here to find out more about The Joy Equation.

Two for the Price of One Entry:

101 Things To Do Before You Go:

Creating a Powerful, Meaningful, Inspiring Life List

Get ready for an inspiring art-filled, mimosa-fueled, life changing ALL AGES MEN AND WOMEN event! Come spend a morning with your best gal pal creating your official “life lists”. Invest some quality hours with your mom or daughter sharing your big dreams. Or bring your husband, boyfriend or partner with you – find out what surprises are on their list!

When? Saturday, August 29th 9 am – 1 pm, Northwest Work Lofts

What? Did you know that the latest scientific research in positive psychology states that creating life lists plays a crucial role in happiness? Join us for an exhilarating morning as we work through a step-by-step method to create a powerful & meaningful life list. We’ll start by identifying your personal core values, complete a few writing & brainstorming exercises to connect values to goals in different slices of life & end by creating a vision board or memory book full of your 101 Things To Do Before You Die. There will be lots of time to create and you’ll walk away with an incredible record of your goals to remind you to “get busy!”

“In my coach training and busy practice, I have discovered that successful people almost always have life lists. These lists enable them to be more joyful, proactive, and accomplished. The most current research underscores that clear-cut goals– and a path to accomplish them– contribute to a meaningful and flourishing life.” – Caroline Adams Miller, author of Creating Your Best Life

How? Preregistration by Thursday, August 27th is required. The Event includes beverages, brunch & art supplies. Cost is $89, so with a two for one entry, each person invests $44.50!!

How to Enter

Simply leave a comment with your all time favorite inspirational quote. Of course, include your name, contact info and which prize you’re interested in.

For extra entries do any of the following:

Sign up for the newsletter & leave a comment letting me know (2 extra entries)
Tweet about the giveaway (1 extra entry per tweet)
Blog this giveaway and leave a comment with the link (3 extra entries)

Winners will be chosen randomly and announced on Twitter next Thursday, August 20th as well as on the blog next Friday.

Good luck all! I can’t wait to read all the fantastic quotes — I’m sure they’ll inspire an extra-joyful week!

My Love/Hate Relationship with Sewing

posted 13th August 2009 Written by: Marisa CATEGORY: All Posts, Creativity, Marisa, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

I have a love hate relationship with sewing. For every five projects I create, I am only really pleased with one. My spare time recently (and to be honest, I have A LOT of spare time) has been dedicated to creating projects and creating an Etsy account.

I also should have prefaced this entry by saying I AM THE QUEEN OF PROCRASTINATION.

Seriously, queen, master, leader, slave, whatever, procrastination has me body and soul. But still, when it comes down to it, I will get it done and get it done well.

My mother taught me how to sew. She used to make me clothes as a child and I remember fondly wearing her dresses with a lot of child pride. They were pretty, simple and always got me attention. She helped me to find my interest creatively too, especially when I sewed my first item at the age of nine years old. It was a Jasmine costume from the Disney movie, Aladdin.

I know, awesome right? IT WAS.

I remember taking sewing classes at Fabric Land longggg ago. She was there too, helping with the classes and at home to guide me and help me with my “homework”. And since Nevada Day was October 31st, we used to get Halloween off from school every year and spend the day waiting in anticipation for trick-or-treating. To this day it’s my favorite holiday and will most likely be for a very long time.

My mother’s favorite costume that she made for me was Snow White. I have very pale skin and black hair so naturally I wore my homemade costume for years. In fact, even though my first Halloween costume was She-Ra, Princess of Power!, most of my Halloween memories are of me as Snow White.

It makes me smile when I think about how much my mom loved to dress my brother and I up in her creations; it was honestly inspiring to see her like that while growing up. I am so thankful she passed on this tradition of creativity.

It wasn’t until I was in college that I started again making my own costumes. First it was Little Red Riding Hood, then a Woodland Fairy and even a Jane Austen gown!

But my most favored possession, the one costume I will keep forever and ever, was MTV’s Daria, my cartoon alter-ego. I’ve been thinking lately about how I need to resurrect Daria for Halloween this year, but recently inspiration for a Wonder Woman costume to add to my collection has been gaining speed.

We’ll see…

I have my mother’s sewing machine now. I had it through school and was even allowed to use it growing up. It’s from the late sixties and works well to this day. Every time I use it I think about her and how I miss those earlier days of being a kid and watching her thread it with such ease and patience. I like how it permanently binds me to her. I like how whenever I push the pedal, the loud fast purring makes me remember how my mother used to chide me into slowing down to sew. And sometimes when I sew something, it staves off the homesickness.

My current projects include three skirts, two tote bags and a recreation of a dress that I found at Goodwill. There’s nothing like wearing clothes you’ve made and knowing that not only do you look good, but also you’re showcasing your talent, your creativity and your passion.

Do the Things That Make You Happy

posted 12th August 2009 Written by: Kendra CATEGORY: All Posts, Kendra, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1, What I've Learned

girl My friend and former roommate, Deb, a cow milking, tree hugging, policy making chick from New York’s Hudson Valley region, positively flits through life.

She’s the kind of girl that you expect to find birds resting on her fingers like something out of Walt Disney’s Snow White.

It’s not that her life is perfect, or that she doesn’t have the same troubles or worries that the rest of us do – she most definitely does – she just seems to always find a way of getting through them with a smile.

One day last summer as I lay in the living room of Casa Guilford (yes, we named it), our sweet little house in the woods of Vermont, Debbie bounded through the living room Tigger-like ‘as was her wont’.

I’d had enough.

“Deb,” I said feeling very much like Piglet out of Winnie the Pooh as I fretted over this and that, “How is it you always seem so Happy?”

“Weeeelllll,” she said in her drawn out way that makes you feel very much as though you’re going to be let in on a Super Special Secret. And then she paused, visibly flummoxed as though she herself hadn’t given it much thought, before brightening and shrugging as she said, “I do the things that make me happy.”

She bounced off to lie in the grass in the field outside of our house leaving me to ponder: How often do I really do the things that bring me pleasure? Not just the Big Things such as travel, but the little things like a mid-day nap in the shade of a tree on a sunny day, setting down a page or two in a scrapbook, or mixing up a batch of much beloved oatmeal raisin cookies for a special friend?

Or are these tiny daily pleasures the first to get shunted aside?

For me, and I’m guessing for a lot of other people as well, the first things to go are the things that bring me pleasure. It’s as my friend Steve pointed out to me recently, “At times, Kendra, it seems that you don’t like to be nice to you.”

And he’s right, over the past year or so I’ve gotten into the habit of being infinitely meaner to myself than I would ever allow myself to be to even my worst enemy. I wouldn’t imagine telling a child they couldn’t eat until they’d finished writing a page of their essay, but I wouldn’t hesitate to do that to myself.

Faced with a lot to do and very little time, I phase out the daily pleasures that make life worth living. Which apart from being cruel, it’s these small pleasures that give us the clarity into figuring out the answers to the Big Questions such as “What am I doing with my life?” and “What job (if any) will bring me joy?”

Steve’s words reminded me of Deb’s so long ago and helped to jolt me out of my-nose-to-the-grindstone stupor.

Consequently, I’ve started to carve several hours out of everyday for the things that give me pleasure. In the past week, in addition to sending out a half a dozen or so resumes, contacting a handful of people for networking opportunities, and diligently working on my graduate school capstone paper, I’ve also spent my week scrapbooking, hanging out with friends, and just messing around.

And you know what?

For the first time in months, when people ask me how I’m feeling, some days I can honestly answer, “Great!”

kendra-bio1

photo credit: Today is a good day

When Do You Know When It’s Time to Go?

posted 11th August 2009 Written by: Andrea CATEGORY: All Posts, Andrea, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1, What I've Learned

This weekend was very laid back in comparison to the past few months of my life.

I took some time to get my life back in order. You know, the usual: laundry, the gym, grocery shopping, painting my nails, laying outside, playing in my garden and reading.

On Saturday, it was so beautiful it was the perfect day to jump in the car and get out of the city to relax. I took a trip to the Chesapeake Bay to try and soak up some sun with a few of my girlfriends. We got to talking about the city, DC life and our jobs. I told them about how excited I am for this blog and to live through my Quarterlife Crisis with other young women going through the same thing.

And then our conversation turned to how we all decided to move to DC (since we all moved here at different times and for different reasons.) It was interesting because lately, I have been thinking about when you know it’s time to move on.

I mean, I’ve lived my whole life according to a certain social time line. We go to high school, try to do well to make it into a great college, try our best in college so you can land an incredible job, maybe go on to graduate school and get a Masters, and then enter the work force.

But what happens after that? There is no set path for us to follow. Everyone takes a different route to try to achieve success. Some get married, some start families and others start businesses.

We all go our separate paths.

Except, how do you decide when and where to go, once you have entered that work force? We are not like our parents– expecting to stay at the same job for 20 years and then retire. So when, if you aren’t settling down or getting a crazy promotion are you supposed to know when to move?

When do you know when it’s time to go?

I talked it over with some female and male friends and this is the advice I was given:

“Stay somewhere until its get too comfortable. If you can predict what’s going to happen the next day its time to go.”
“Go when life doesn’t excite you anymore.”
“Go when you feel you need someplace new. After you have lived someplace for a while then you know its time to go.”
“You go when you know if you didn’t go right then, at that moment, you’d never leave and get stuck doing the same old thing for the rest of your life.”

I’m not saying I’m thinking of leaving DC anytime soon. I constantly walk down the street or hop on the metro and think of how grateful I am to be in this place. I have the best roommates, I live in an amazing area of the city, I have a job that challenges me (from time to time), a man who loves me, and a phenomenal family just a plane ride away.

This is where I always dreamed I would be. But, there are days when I wake up and wonder: How will I know when it’s time to go?

How will you know?

Andrea (new) bio.