How Homeschooling in Middle School Affected My QLC in My 20′s

posted 31st August 2010 Written by: Doniree CATEGORY: Doniree, Family, Season 3, What I've Learned

development, education, family, homeschooling, learning, parents

I was homeschooled through most of middle school.

Specifically, I was homeschooled for five and a half years during third, fifth, sixth, seventh, half of eighth, and ninth grade. I used to really enjoy telling people this because I felt as though my family busted right through the stereotype that was homeschooling, particularly the ‘how’d you have a social life?‘ and ‘didn’t that shelter you?‘ questions that typically followed. However, I don’t think that stereotype exists really anymore, so now when I talk about those five and a half years, I tout what I felt were the really strong contributors to my work ethic and relationships today.

So, this is my homeschooling story.

Why we did it

Here’s the short story: My parents decided to homeschool my sister and I after my second grade year and her first grade year. They’d run into a bit of a disagreement with the school administration over what kind of information they could and wouldn’t share with parents about what the students were being taught and tested on. Feeling as though they should get to have some idea about what their six and seven year old were being taught, they pulled us out of public school after that year and took matters into their own hands – using an approved national cirruculum from a private school based in Florida. That was that.

Lessons Learned

Being homeschooled from essentially late elementary school through middle school was pretty formative, and in retrospect, one of the best things to have happened to me. I appreciate the development that happened in those years and feel that there are three things in particular that have shaped me and have influenced my work ethic, professional direction in life, and ultimately the handling of my own quarter-life crisis.

I’m grateful for the years my parents taught us at home because:

I learned how to self-teach. Perhaps one of the best things to come out of being homeschooled from 3rd-9th grade is the ability I developed to teach myself information. We had cirriculum and my parents were great teachers, but ultimately I was responsible for reading, understanding, and presenting the information I learned about each of the topics we studied. This came in handy especially in college when professors weren’t spoon-feeding us everything anymore, and expected students to take responsibility for their own futures. Today, as a self-employed blogger, consultant, and aspiring yoga teacher, the ability to keep myself motivated and constantly learning is as much a crucial part of my personal growth as it is my professional life.

It changed the way I believed work time should and could be structured. I remember starting our “school day” at 8AM (yes, we had to be “on time”) and being done by or shortly after lunch. What took middle schools 7 hours to teach and accomplish between hallway time, lunch hours, etc., we nailed in 4-5 hours. Since I’ve left the “traditional” work force again this fall, I’m back to working from home for a few different clients. Knowing that it’s possible to “work smarter, not longer hours” keeps me focused in the mornings so I have my afternoons to work on my own projects, take yoga, and spend time with my friends – for the most part. The golden nugget of this set-up is that it reinforces balance, something that remains a massive priority in my life.

The things I’ve learned from my family are some of the most important lessons I’ve learned in my life. From teacher-student lessons to parent-daughter lessons, I’ve learned more than how to manipulate a curfew and how to diagram a sentence. Thanks to Ma, Pops, Mir, and Jeff, I’ve learned: Alabama history, how to sauté mushrooms, what to cook cornbread in, how important the first grade is, what a laminating machine could be used for, how to pronounce “Gewurztraminer,” how to play Canasta, what an ERA is, the Caray family lineage (Harry, Skip, and Chip), some inner workings of today’s school system, how to cook with wine, and the importance of down time, alone time, and family time.

A Balance of Learning

Miranda and I went back to public school for high school, and I have to be honest – I loved it. I know a ton of people who hated their middle and high school years, but I look back on middle school and I see a time in my life where foundations were set, where habits and work ethics were developed, and relationships with my mom, dad, and sister were strengthened. I look back on high school and see a time when all of those previous years enabled me to self-teach and stay far on top of assignments and classwork in high school, enabled me to keep my head on straight and only get into a little bit of trouble, and ultimately appreciate the balance that was spending a few focused years learning at home so that I could spend the last years of my pre-secondary education rounding out academics with relationships and getting a better idea about what I wanted to do after that.

Role models and support systems

Family plays a huge role in who we are, and how I’ve landed where I’m at today. I’m eternally grateful for having a support system of parents, a sister, and in the last few years, a brother-in-law that stayed supportive as I hammered out all of my big dreams. Big dreams that have included from the very start writing, travel, self-managing, and constant learning and now into my late twenties really haven’t changed that much, but through their counseling, teaching, and unconditional love have been better defined and pursued than ever.

{Image credit: I swiped it from my sister’s Facebook page.}

Comments (11)

575711 Responses2010-08-31+23%3A33%3A56Doniree to “How Homeschooling in Middle School Affected My QLC in My 20′s”

Alisha Says:
August 31st, 2010 at 4:04 pm
Beautiful! I am so glad that the stereotype that homeschooled children are weird is slowly fading away. I think there is a lot to be said about the kinds of opportunities children are given when they are homeschooled. Some schools are great and for some children they work just fine. Some kids thrive by being homeschooled. I think the timing there was crucial; those middle school years are so difficult. You were able to sort through those changes and emotions in a more loving environment; which is probably why your transition to high school wasn't so difficult. I should stop my dissertation Bravo to you and your family. And it's so wonderful that you are able to now look back on that experience and see how it groomed you for your success today.
Mir Says:
August 31st, 2010 at 4:30 pm
This may be one of my favorite of all your posts. I, too, look at our homeschooling as a wonderful opportunity to learn and grow in the absolute most loving atmosphere possible. I am forever grateful to mom and dad for deciding to do that, and I do think that because we had to self-teach and learn to manage our time and our studies, we learned how to prioritize- not just academically but in life. You are such a glowing example of that- balancing your life with the things you want to do and need to do (and most often, they go hand in hand because you've come to a place where you are doing what you want to be doing!). I am SO proud of you!
Jenn Bollenbacher Says:
August 31st, 2010 at 6:17 pm
I never knew this about you! But it totally makes sense and I definitely see how it has shaped you. And umm… I just learned to play Canasta a couple weeks ago so please come visit me in Atlanta and play with me!
Randy (aka, Pops) Says:
August 31st, 2010 at 6:26 pm
You did a wonderful job telling your homeschooled story. You and Miranda were not deprived for a social life. Softball, basketball, swimming, plays, bible drill, spelling bees, serving seniors, youth group activities, etc.
Lindsey Says:
August 31st, 2010 at 6:30 pm
I've always wondered what it was like to me homeschooled. It's awesome it was such a good alternative to the public school system – what a great foundation for a life of freedom!
Cait Says:
August 31st, 2010 at 7:40 pm
Oh, to be able to self-teach. It's a skill I was never really able to pick up on and I paid for it during the later years in my education. I love seeing the other side of homeschooling because I, too, had the same stereotypical ideas in my head about it. It's so interesting to hear untold stories about someone's life, especially something like this because you kind of expect that everyone had the "typical" schooling experience.
nikkiklecha Says:
September 1st, 2010 at 6:20 am
That's awesome!! I need to learn a bit of that self-management and balance from you!
Molly_Hoyne Says:
September 4th, 2010 at 10:45 am
Oooh! New information about Miss Doniree!! I would love to hear more about your experience (in person hopefully, over a cheese plate!) and ask you a million questions. If you have kids, is this something you'd consider? Do you think that most kids could benefit from some "life skills" classes? And lots more. The state of education is something that fascinates me (and is potentially a future direction I'd like to move in!) and I want your take.

XO
doniree Says:
September 4th, 2010 at 4:02 pm
I'd love to chat about education over cheese plates! When you have your scheduled nailed down – let me know when you're coming through Boulder-town!
Doniree Says:
September 6th, 2010 at 6:48 am
My sister and I really enjoyed it, and I'm grateful for the balance that included some public schooling too – I feel like that gave us both perspective on the advantages that both kinds of education offer.
tootsiemom Says:
November 16th, 2010 at 6:27 am
I'm so glad you and Mir have good memories of homeschooling. It was a difficult to decision to make, but now I can see how much 'more' you learned from Walker Elementary Looking back, i wouldn't change a thing. It definitely was a labor of love….and look at 'my girls' now!