Morning Bliss: The Best Part of Waking Up

posted 3rd September 2010    Written by: Alisha    CATEGORY: Alisha, All Posts, Family, Life Lesson, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 3, Tips & Tools, Travel, Travel/Adventure

Each morning I rise, give praise for the rays of light.  Sun salutations, cat poses, savasanas.  The warmth of the chai spreads through my chest, into my arms, down my legs.  The air inside is still; the only noise I hear is the gentle hum of the refridgerator as it toils to keep the food cold during these dog days of summer.  With a pen in hand, I scribble all my thoughts and dreams from the days before.  Every penstroke is a gentle caress on the smooth, vanilla bean paper.  My head and heart empty, ready to recieve the gifts the present day may bring.

O. M. G.  I wish.  This is how it really goes down:

Right around dawn, my daughter screams.  She doesn’t whimper, she doesn’t cry.  She screams at the top of her lungs.  I nurse her, lay her back down in her crib and cross my fingers and toes in hopes that I can get just forty-five more minutes of sleep.  I make it back to my own bed, curl up into the fetal position and pull the blankets over my head.  32 minutes pass by and at 6:47 a.m. she is ready to begin her day.  I change her diaper, get the coffee started (extra-strong please!), make her oatmeal, wash a few dishes and sweep the floor as I wait for my son to emerge.  At 7:02 a.m. he stumbles into the kitchen, rubbing his eyes and muttering something about dinosaurs.  He demands animal crackers for breakfast.

“I don’t think so little man.  How about cereal and milk?” I ask him sweetly.

“Mmmmm.  Eh-eh.  Animals.”

“Toast and butter?”  I say as I look him sternly in the eye.

“Eh-eh!  Animals!”

“No.  Cereal and milk or toast and butter?”  Hunched over and with a raised eye-brow, I repeat his options.

“Animals!  Animals!  Animals!” he protests while jumping up and down, much to the dismay of the neighbors below, I am sure.

I mean, really.  I have not had any coffee yet, I am still in my underwear–literally–and at only 7:08 in the morning, Time Out Number 1 is underway.  It is totally not the zen-filled morning I so desperately crave.  Take this morning, repeat it 4 days a week, and multiply it by 52 weeks in a year.  That equals 208.  208 out of 365 days of my year start out this way.  So it is no wonder that when I dream about my “perfect” life, I am usually alone.

According to my therapist, this is because I don’t vacate.  I do not make the time to do those things in which I take delight.  So this week, I am taking my therapist’s advice and vacating.  Well, vacating as much as I possibly can with a husband and two kids.  We are off to Colorado, my friends!  Seven days and six nights away from home, in the bright sunshine and crisp mountain air.  And while I am there, I will make time for myself.  This is not a plan, this is a promise.  I am making a promise to be kind to myself…to allow myself to vacate (at least a teensy little bit) because I know that upon my return I will be renewed, refreshed, regenerated.

I recently finished working through Week 1 of The Joy Equation and I had a breakthrough.  It was the kind of breakthrough that made me feel strong, empowered, brave, ready to take on the world with clearer vision.  You see, at the end of Week 1, I made a list of 8 core values.  Molly calls our core values ”the Habits of our Heart.”  She couldn’t be more right.  Through Week 1′s exercises I realized that a lot of the pain and suffering I had experienced over the last five or six years was kind of my own fault: I made choices that discounted my intuition and casted my values aside.  (Okay, that and the whole bi-polar thing too.)  It was a slap in the face, but I welcomed it.

I decided that I was ready for some fun again. I want to get back to a little bit of that old “Alisha”.  Old Alisha was fun, a little more free, and a lot happier.  So, on this vacation, I am going to vacate my old ways; I am going to reintegrate my core values into my life and into my choices.  I think life will be more fun that way.

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Comments (9)

9 Responses to “Morning Bliss: The Best Part of Waking Up”

  • nikkiklecha Says:
    September 3rd, 2010 at 10:10 am

    YAAAAAAAY!!! (and girl, you made me laugh out loud on your second paragraph!) Have so much fun; I can't wait to hear what clarity comes from this vacay. xx

  • emmajoan Says:
    September 3rd, 2010 at 10:24 am

    Oh my gosh Alisha, I've never thought before about how much I take advantage of solo mornings before. I hope you enjoy your vacation and get some alone time and some family-love time as well :)

  • erinmakesitwork Says:
    September 3rd, 2010 at 5:14 pm

    Darlin' this is what makes you so amazing (one of many reasons I am sure). Unlike so many people you are willing to talk about what's wrong, admit that you have faults and ask for help. That makes you so strong, probably much stronger than you realize. Have a great time in Colorado. Say hi to the mountains for me.

  • Lindsey Says:
    September 4th, 2010 at 5:16 am

    Your zen-morning is dreamy – even without screaming babies I can hardly achieve that. You made me laugh :)
    Hope you enjoy your vacationing! Colorado is beautiful!

  • Alisha Says:
    September 4th, 2010 at 6:22 am

    Hehe. It was a blast. I will make sure to do an update :)

  • Alisha Says:
    September 4th, 2010 at 6:24 am

    Thanks, Emma :) I miss my quiet Saturday and Sunday mornings. However, I know that this is just a season in life and soon, they'll be se bsuy and off on their own and I'll have my peace and quiet once again.

  • Alisha Says:
    September 4th, 2010 at 6:25 am

    Awww, thanks Erin. I sometimes wonder if I over-share; but I do know that my transparency sometimes helps others share their own struggles. It's nice to know that you aren't alone :) I will whisper a sweet hello to the mountains for you!

  • Molly_Hoyne Says:
    September 4th, 2010 at 10:04 am

    I was all like, oooh that morning sounds awesome- that's what I want! You totally got me and I laughed out loud when reality came crashing back in. And I hope that Colorado was full of vacating and delight and taking some time for yourself, by yourself.

    As someone who knows that screaming little ones and timeouts and animal crackers are in my future (not yet, though guys!!), I have to admit, I gave a little shudder for how much I love my sleep… But I know that you, and so many other amazing women, manage. Perhaps go a little crazy (eh?) but manage.

    I'd love to hear what your other values are, A.

  • Alisha Says:
    September 4th, 2010 at 7:39 pm

    Yes…sleep, oh precious sleep. I never used to sleep much anyway, usually only 6 hrs a night, but it's totally different when someone *makes* you wake up :) We do manage, though, as you can see above, it's not always easy.

    I will touch on the values a little bit more in the next post, but I will shoot you an email too :)

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