How Did We Get So Lucky?

posted 9th December 2010    Written by: Marian    CATEGORY: All Posts, Life Lesson, Marian, Season 3, Spirituality, What I've Learned

On Thanksgiving day I wrote a post about the things I was thankful for. The post – and list – was neither unique nor exciting. It included my family, dog, boyfriend, job, friends. Blah blah blah. Obviously not in that order. Of course. My dog always comes first.

But the point is, I’m an incredibly lucky person. And I wish I didn’t forget that all the damn time.

It may not be Thanksgiving, but maybe that’s even more of a reason to remind myself that despite my lack of money, desire to lose a few pounds and frustration at my own mood swings, I have it pretty damn good.

I grew up in an obscenely wealthy neighborhood. My boyfriend does the dishes without complaint. He offers to do the dishes. I’m in good health. I’ve never been subject to extreme race or sexism. I’ve never been abused. I’ve never been hungry. I always have clothes. In fact, I have too many clothes. I have a walk-in closet. I’ve traveled the world. I’m in love with with the coolest person ON EARTH.

Basically, I’m waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Sometimes a bad thing happens: I was held for two days in detainment when trying to get into England. I was groped on the streets by a group of guys and I stood there and did nothing. I wasted seven years of my life with an emotionally abusive guy. I was on anti-depressants for years.

And still? My life is so damn good it baffles me.

How is it possible that millions upon millions of people are starving or murdered or raped? How can I sit writing this in the third floor of my Greenwich, CT house while someone, somewhere, is getting shot?

How are my brothers perfectly healthy – though troublesome – while my best friend’s brother just recently died?

Why do some people luck out and others are doomed before they even have a chance?

And do we all “get it” in the end? Will I crash on the way to New Zealand? Will my whole family die in some horrific crash? (I didn’t crash. I’m editing this while in my new bedroom. Photos to come!)

Wow. Depressing, Marian. Cut it out.

It’s funny, because I’m not a doom and gloom kind of girl. Sure, I took some happy drugs in college because I was going through a horrific break-up, but I’m pretty much fine. And horrific? Well, it sucked, but I’m alive.

Basically, I don’t really think about this stuff often. Sure, I lucked out, but I’ll donate the occasional $20 to some charity or serve at a soup kitchen and be done with it. I don’t often reflect on the fact that I’m in the top whatever percent in the world.

God, even the fact that I’m writing on a site about “strategies for joy” is ridiculous if you think about it. We’re all in this position where we’ve lucked out so hard that we don’t have to think about the fact that we ate this morning and instead can focus on what we want out of our lives. Spiritually. Romantically. Whatever.

Honestly, I am – we are – so fucking lucky. Think about it. For a second. Thank your God or your spirit tree or mom or whoever for the fact that you are on this blog right now and no matter what work you have to finish or drama going on with that friend of yours. You are so absurdly well off. Take advantage of it. Just don’t jump out of a plane or anything to test your luck because I am totally not responsible.

[photo credit: mtsofan]

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Comments (9)

9 Responses to “How Did We Get So Lucky?”

  • Big L Says:
    December 9th, 2010 at 9:35 am

    I have nothing but love for this post! After a week of feeling frustrated, angry, overwhelmed for really no good reason – while I have the fortune of eating, sleeping, living, and breathing easier than so many others – maybe this is just the kick in the ass I need! :-)

  • Natasha Hollerup Says:
    December 9th, 2010 at 11:05 am

    This was my biggest lesson this year. I am so fucking lucky, I can't believe it. Right now, I'm thanking God for all of the kicks in the ass he gave me, as well as the hugs and handholds he gave me as well. We're lucky. I will always remember that.

  • Alisha Says:
    December 9th, 2010 at 11:29 am

    We definitely forget that really, we're just lucky to be alive.

  • erin Says:
    December 9th, 2010 at 12:27 pm

    I read this quote the other day from Brene Brown and it sums up other-shoe-will-drop-worry: "Most of us have experienced being on the edge of joy only to be overcome by vulnerability and thrown into fear. Until we can tolerate vulnerability and transform it into gratitude, intense feelings of love will often bring up the fear of loss."

    I think you are right on with this post – being grateful and thankful of all the good stuff is how we feel joy. Can't wait to see some NZ photos soon :-)

  • Casey Says:
    December 9th, 2010 at 6:30 pm

    Makes me realize that I need to stop bitching about school work and be thankful that not only do I have the opportunity to go to shcool, but that I have a job and that my job actually PAYS for my schooling. And of course that leads to another thankful thought and another and another and another… Thanks for the reminder :-)

  • Lauriane Says:
    December 10th, 2010 at 3:50 am

    Thank you Marian, this was inspiring! Just like Big L above, I've been feeling cranky for no good reason, and reading your post, it suddenly hits me that I should me pinching myself a little more often, to realize that my life is great… maybe not perfect, maybe I have to work on the down points, but great after all.

    Have great holidays girl, and enjoy Kiwi land!! I spent a year there 2 years ago and I miss it oh so much… (if you want any travel tips by the way, I'd be more than happy to share :) )

  • Jackie Says:
    December 10th, 2010 at 8:26 am

    Great post, Marian – and so true! I feel guilty often when I find myself complaining and then realize how I really have nothing to complain about at all, in the relative scheme of things.

  • erinmakesitwork Says:
    December 12th, 2010 at 1:48 pm

    You are so right…sometimes it is so easy to forget just how lucky we are. This season, I vow to remind myself how lucky I am to be here, living my life.

  • FabulouslyBroke.com Says:
    December 31st, 2010 at 3:56 am

    I love this post.

    I too, feel extremely lucky. I have only experienced a couple of really bad points but the good outweighs the rest by a huge margin.

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