Feeling Overwhelmed?

posted 16th May 2011    Written by: Molly Mahar    CATEGORY: Inspiration, Molly, What I've Learned

Perhaps in evidence of the “You buy a periwinkle Subaru and now see periwinkle Subarus everywhere” phenomenon, I’m feeling overwhelmed right now and it seems like my entire Twitter & Facebook feed is full of others feeling the same way.

I’m not complaining.

My overwhelm is overwhelmingly… amazing.  Full of opportunity.  In line with how I want to live my life, if just a bit too fast and furious.

Unlike other amazing women I know, I’m not dealing with a scary new diagnoses, a failing business, a lost job, or a sick parent.  I’m very lucky and extremely grateful to be experiencing a period of upswing overwhelm.  I get this. My overwhelm is fueled by huge Stratejoy growth, numerous strong friendships I’m trying to keep up with, a loving marriage, a crazy travel schedule, and an upcoming move to a sunny city that goes by the name of San Diego.

Yet still, I’m experiencing those familiar effects of overwhelm. I have daily urges to throw up my hands, hibernate and ignore my massive actions plans.  I’m slipping into eating convenient junk instead of the healthy meals that I actually enjoy.  Messages are not returned, my blog posts are late, my yoga mat is simply traveling in my car with me as I frantically run errands and attend to urgent items like my health insurance billing disaster, booking flights for next weekend, and having a supply of clean underwear…

Sound familiar?

Here’s the thing.  I’m learning how to just be with my overwhelm. To recognize it, be gentle with it, and not blame myself for letting it “get to this point again.”

Instead of beating myself up over all of this, I’ve been practicing accepting things as they are right now.

I’ve been letting my 76 paying clients be the priority for a these two months because I made a huge commitment to be there for them.  I’ve been letting myself out of social obligations in order to sort out moving to a new state and launching a new program.  I’ve been walking to get coffee instead of going to the gym.  As I once heard Danielle say in reference to creating her Fire Starter Sessions, “I’ve been ordering pizza and opting out of things that I normally do, to create time for what I need to do right now.”

Because I realize this is a temporary passing state, I’m giving myself permission to not have all my shit together.

I trust myself enough to know that I will circle back to a state of “balance” where I become my first priority again.

I know that all my vibrant expressions of my values will come back into play soon enough.  I know that I will drag my tired butt to yoga when I’m ready.  I know that I’ll stop prioritizing sleep over sex.  I know that I’ll review my intentions and goals for this year and figure out what needs to happen next.  I know that I’ll clean up my diet, return all those weeks of missed calls, and start playing a lot more on the weekends.

But for now?  I’m taking this list to heart. And if you’re overwhelmed right now, I’m giving you permission to do the same.

When you’re Overwhelmed, it’s Okay to…

What would go on your list?

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Comments (26)

26 Responses to “Feeling Overwhelmed?”

  • amandafarough Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 4:33 pm

    When I feel overwhelmed, I remind myself that it's okay to indulge in the things that make me happy: a day of shopping; playing hours and hours of video games; and writing my little heart out. Y'know, instead of designing or branding. These days, I feel like I need more of that downtime.

    But then… ZomBaby is almost here! Aaaaah!

  • Elizabeth Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 5:35 pm

    Wow. I totally needed this today. I've been feeling extremely overwhelmed lately with GOOD things. I've found myself letting the gym take a back seat as well as my healthy eating. I was beating myself up about this until I read your post. I need to just let myself BE in this situation and do what I need to do (with moderation) to get through it. I see balance on the horizon, I just have to get there.

    Thank you for sharing :)

  • Bridget Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 5:58 pm

    I'm right there with you, sister. I allow myself naps when appropriate, telling non-essential plans/duties that I'm not available (and not letting the guilt get to me), and I remind myself that I WILL get it figured out, one baby step at a time.

  • Leigh Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 7:11 pm

    You mean it's OKAY to feel overwhelmed and veg out and have pasta and jarred sauce for dinner and sit in bed at night and read RSS feeds and avoid phone calls and skip Friday night yoga even though you maybe should have gone?

    Good to know. :-)
    Perfect timing.

  • jillamorgan Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 7:12 pm

    Thank you for this. I've so much to be grateful for, sometimes, especially now, it just feels like too much. Nothing a hot bath, glass of wine and pajamas won't cure.

  • Molly_Mahar Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 7:59 pm

    You'll just have to indulge in some quality Zombaby time! xo

  • Molly_Mahar Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 8:00 pm

    Jill- you read my mind… That's exactly where I'm headed! Well, minus the pajamas. They get tangled up on me!! (And you're welcome.)

  • Molly_Mahar Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 8:05 pm

    As long as we don't make it a habit— YESSSSSS.

    p.s. I indulged in two delicious Dick's burgers last night, a vanilla shake & some Grey's Anatomy. It was just what I needed to kick some booty today.

    p.p.s. And when you get to Seattle- you will know that awesomeness that is $1.40 cheeseburgers until all hours of the night! Unless you are a vegetarian, and then you'll just have to drink the $1.50 shakes…

  • Clementine Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 8:20 pm

    Molly: You are a god send in stressful times. Thanks for your infinite wisdom and sharing your life with me…Now I guess I am just going to have to get to San Diego again to visit. You are wonderful. And I share your feeling of being overwhelmed and blessed.

  • Kate Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 8:21 pm

    I'm feeling overwhelmed (read: freaking out/nervous/terrified/etc/etc/etc) about my 4 months in Asia that starts on Wednesday.

    < insert anxiety attack here >

  • Erica Cosminsky Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 8:30 pm

    Oh Molly, Overwhelm can be one of those daunting things. I've been trying this just letting overwhelm be thing. So I found out Friday I'm not going to graduate in August. I was really kind of bummed that I'm having to take speech class for a 4th time (not because I can't pass but because I can't finish the course) until today when my professor HIRED me and then the really cute aerospace student flirted and followed me all the way to my car to open the door for me (he better ask me out now or he's just being creepy :) .

    It's hard to be laid back, and believe that everything happens for a reason and be totally stressed out and overwhelmed.

    When is this move going down?

  • Linda Snyder Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 8:40 pm

    How did you get so smart at half my age? Love your wisdom girl!!!

  • jillianwalker Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 9:12 pm

    Ahhh totally on the same page Molly. Not too long ago I blogged about being overwhelmed with 'opportunity' – http://t.co/BQgf5dn. People thought I was crazy. I have been waiting to hear the concept "upswing overwhelm," so thank you. Fantastic to hear that people are in the same boat with awesome in their lives. I'm a true believer that calms come; soon I'll get around to my taxes and Facebook messages. :)

  • loveMEfiercely Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 9:17 pm

    Reason #23,987,308,287 why we are good seestars. Straight from an email I wrote this a.m. to my sponsor: "I'm trying to remind myself that I know what I have in front of me today – work, Zumba, meeting, meeting w/ sponsee – and that all I have to do is get through these things with integrity and kindness. To myself and others. Nothing else."

    We're on the same wavelength. LOVE you!

  • deebuzzing Says:
    May 16th, 2011 at 9:35 pm

    Hells Yes. I think I might just tape this to the inside of my journal to give myself permission to calm down and accept the chaos, like, TOMORROW :)

  • Katie [blogs] Says:
    May 17th, 2011 at 4:16 am

    Totally needed to see and hear this. Deep down, I know i can give myself permission to do these things, but hearing it from somewhere else just solidifies it. Love it, Molly-Pants.

  • Julie Says:
    May 17th, 2011 at 5:11 am

    THANK YOU MOLLY!
    My life is SO overwhelming right now with exciting AND stressful/not-so-pleasant-to-deal-with to-dos.
    Yes I feel guilty for taking on so much at the same time and dissatisfied with the fact that my life doesn't feel like the one I WANT to have (because who wants to run non stop from 6 am to 10 pm all the time). ME TOO, I want more free time, healthy meals, more yoga, a fresh hair cut, time to walk in the sun and new decent clothes that I don't even have time to shop for. I too buy the packaged mix salads (and laughed at reading this) and feel guilty for not cooking more, I too neglect my blog and don't even have time to look for new clients. BUT those overwhelming projects are what I chose to do with my life this year. And I remind myself every day that it is exactly what I want for my life : experiencing as many things as possible. I tell my BF everynight that our life is crazy, but RICH. Rich with a rock band, an inspiring blog, a growing business, an exciting professional challenge, a creative wedding in preparation and a love nest in the making. THANK YOU so much for sharing this. It energized my day. I had to send some energy your way too. This is more than 3 sentences but that's because I type very fast – xoxo

  • amandafarough Says:
    May 17th, 2011 at 7:00 am

    I have much of the excitement for you for this upcoming adventure, lovely lady. <3

  • Juliana Says:
    May 17th, 2011 at 7:38 am

    20 minutes in the sunshine is often the only prescription I need! Thank you for this, I think a lot of people needed it. :)

  • Big L Says:
    May 17th, 2011 at 3:34 pm

    How'd you get to be so wise, anyway?! ;) I love this post and all of the genius thoughts and encouragement within it!

  • tiffany | live happy Says:
    May 17th, 2011 at 3:47 pm

    Thank you times a million for this! It's always nice to know you (or in this case me) aren't alone out there!

  • Courtney Elizabeth Says:
    May 19th, 2011 at 11:46 am

    i love this! so often i get obsessed with making a list of check boxes in my filofax that i feel i will never ever complete.

  • Accepting Life’s Messy Parts | Stratejoy | Conquer Your Quarterlife Crisis through Fresh Strategies for Real Joy Says:
    May 25th, 2011 at 8:02 am

    [...] post last week about being overwhelmed and responding to it with trust and patience really struck a chord with [...]

  • Kerry Says:
    October 17th, 2011 at 8:11 am

    Love this post!! exactly what i needed… Ummm Top thing on my list… Its okay not to have a wedding!!! Jeans, Hoodie, a clergy… and a new lease on life :)

  • Sherry Says:
    November 17th, 2011 at 4:50 pm

    I,m a 49 year young woman and have been feeling overwhelmed about life lately…..knowing that I'm not alone certainly helps :o ). Now that I've recognized it…..I can do something about it….I will go with the flow and take each day as it comes…..Thank you Molly :o )

  • Jena Says:
    April 25th, 2012 at 9:24 am

    Yeah, I'm kinda feeling this right now. I don't feel like doing much of anything currently. I'm too tired, and I am voluntarily having tunnel vision at the moment. My room will be clean later, right? :)

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