Why It’s Okay That College Killed My Creativity

posted 9th October 2011    Written by: Kat    CATEGORY: All Posts, Kat, Life Lesson, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 5, What I've Learned

It might be that I have a terrible memory, or it might be that I’ve blocked out a lot of my high school years. Whatever it is, I don’t recall much of 1995-1999. Bits here and there, yes, but nothing particularly consistent.

One thing that I do remember is a quote from one of my teachers. Maybe it’s because it was particularly poignant, or maybe it’s because he gave several homilies based on that quote over the years. (I attended a Catholic high school, and we had weekly Mass on Wednesday mornings.) All I know is that to this day, I’ve got this line ingrained in my mind:

“You can’t give thanks for what you take for granted.”

I grew up believing that I could do anything. At age six, the list of careers I thought I might have ranged from fashion designer to the first female president of the United States. From reading, to painting and drawing, to Girl Scouts, my parents encouraged my hobbies. By age 10 or 11, my grandfather had me reading and discussing the business section of The New York Times on Sundays. Most distinctly, I remember winning my local spelling bee at age 13, and my dad asked me what was next. I responded that I would win regionals and compete in the National Spelling Bee that year.

And you know what? I did. And my parents were behind me 100% of the way.

I’m a little hard on my parents sometimes because I wasn’t allowed to choose a creative career/degree. Looking back on it, I don’t know that I would have been able to put together a portfolio that would have gotten me into an art school, and I don’t know that it would have been the best thing for me in the long run. I can give you a list of reasons why I feel like college made me dumber–though the more I think about it, what I really mean is that my undergraduate degree in business and the accompanying classes killed my creativity. It’s taken me years of slowly building my creative confidence again to do what I’m doing now: traveling, teaching, and building writing and photography portfolios.

Here’s the thing, though: you can’t give thanks for what you take for granted.

I forget that I was able to read at age three, and that my parents enrolled me in some accelerated classes in elementary school. Approximately one-quarter of girls in developing countries aren’t in school at all according to the Girl Effect, and I had the chance to go above and beyond basic schooling with those classes and extracurriculars.

I ignore the fact that college was a given for me, and even though I didn’t exactly choose the right degree, I learned a lot about myself when I was there, met interesting people and made some long-term connections, and was able to study and live in another culture for four months. According to the Girl Effect, an extra year of secondary school boosts girls’ eventual wages by 15 to 25 percent.

I’m fortunate that I am 30, single, and have enough money saved to travel for three months and move to another country. It’s easy to forget that when you’re living in a culture like the one in New York City, where you can’t keep up with people who are making two or more times your income, where rents are high, and where the first question anyone asks is what you do for work.

I’m lucky that I grew up with a family that pushed me to excel in and out of school. I’m fortunate that I was able to get a degree that helped me obtain a job that increased my earnings so that I could save the money to live life on my terms now. Without the foundation that I had, all of the work I’ve done over the past ten years probably wouldn’t have gotten me here.

On my photo blog, one of our recent themes was gratitude. Ending the New York chapter of my life and beginning the next part of my journey has had me thinking about my family, friends, and life in new ways.

It’s time to give thanks.

[photo credit: me!]

Bookmark and Share
Comments (10)

10 Responses to “Why It’s Okay That College Killed My Creativity”

  • erinmakesitwork Says:
    October 9th, 2011 at 4:22 pm

    Thank you so much for this. People often don't understand my ambivilant feelings toward college. I don't really feel like I learned much that taught me about how I wanted to live my life. Still, I am grateful for the opportunity and the chance to grow so much.

  • Kristin Says:
    October 10th, 2011 at 7:55 am

    Just discovered you via @stratejoy. So, so very glad I did. Thank you for this – and I'll certainly be in touch!

  • Kristin Says:
    October 10th, 2011 at 8:02 am

    Oh! I meant via @DaveUrsillo. You know, that guy who's everywhere. ; )

  • KristenCF Says:
    October 11th, 2011 at 4:50 pm

    Love this– “You can’t give thanks for what you take for granted.” Will remember this more each day.

  • Katie Says:
    October 13th, 2011 at 10:39 am

    I feel the same way about college. I'm still trying to find my way back to myself, its crazy how places for "learning" can sap your energy and personality like that. I was so focused on doing all the "right things" that I left a lot of things behind.

  • Kat Says:
    October 27th, 2011 at 4:45 am

    I'm so happy that you were able to relate to this. It's interesting how college has become an expectation in American culture, and yet I think that so many people – the two of us included – aren't getting much out of it. It's good to take what we can out of it, I think – and know that we're fortunate to have had that time and those opportunities, even if they weren't about the classes we were taking. You know?

  • Kat Says:
    October 27th, 2011 at 5:28 am

    Yay, awesome! @DaveUrsillo is everywhere, right? :) Glad you stopped by, and looking forward to conversing with you!

  • Kat Says:
    October 27th, 2011 at 5:30 am

    Right? I don't remember much from high school, but I do remember that. It's a good one, isn't it?

  • Kat Says:
    October 27th, 2011 at 5:32 am

    I graduated in 2003, and I'm finally – for maybe the past year – feeling creative and inspired again. But hey, I made a lot of friends and connections in college that I never would have met otherwise, so…it's a balance. Can you think of the times when you felt most YOU?

  • I Left My Heart in Prague | Stratejoy | Conquer Your Quarterlife Crisis through Fresh Strategies for Real Joy Says:
    December 11th, 2011 at 8:03 am

    [...] lit up at night – I was certain that by the end of the semester, I’d take that view for granted. I figured that once things became routine, the city wouldn’t feel so incredible anymore. [...]

Leave a Reply

name*


email* (will not be published)


website


comments