Category: Season 1

Keep What Really Matters

posted 13th January 2010    Written by: Andrea    CATEGORY: All Posts, Andrea, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

I was inspired by Kendra’s post in August about giving it all away and made it a goal to downsize my life before the turn of the new year.

It wasn’t easy, but I spent a weekend and went through my entire room. I was able to get rid of clothes, shoes, bags, belts, jewelry- so much that I hadn’t actually used. I was shocked at all the extra material ‘things’ I had in my possession. It made me realize that I don’t actually need, or want ‘things.’

I had 8 bags of unused ‘things’ just sitting around cluttering my life. It felt so good to get rid of them. I donated it all to Goodwill so I hope ‘things’ that were of no use to me, may be able to help someone else.

It made me see that things sort of tie you down. They hold you back and usually remind you of the past. I want to change my mentality where I hold on to things. It’s time to grow up, move on and get rid of the stuff.

I’ve always been envious of people who didn’t need things to keep them happy. I want to be one of those people.

I’m learning that people and places make me happy, memories make me happy- not things. One day I will only have a small pile of things. A pile so small that if I want to pack up and move or visit an exotic country I wouldn’t need many things. I won’t feel so attached to material possessions.

I won’t even miss them!

I have a simple strategy to figure out what can stay and what can go: every few weeks I look around at my ‘things’ and take a few of them I haven’t used in months and put them in a bag. Then, I put that bag in the trunk of my car (or someplace where I won’t see it everyday.) If a few more months go by and I still don’t realize these things are gone, they get donated to Goodwill or sold online or unloaded through this nifty network of people giving things away called Freecycle.

Try it sometime. It’s worked for me. Memories will always be there, you don’t need ‘things’ to remind you of the good times (or the bad!). Take some time this month and start your 2010 off right.

Downsize your life and keep what really matters.


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The Beauty of Pain

posted 12th January 2010    Written by: Kendra    CATEGORY: All Posts, Kendra, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

My freshman year of college floor mate, a short distance track runner who had turned down an acceptance from West Point but still had the discipline to match a military school cadet, had placed a homemade sign above her desk which read:

Pain is the weakness leaving your body.

It is one of those cliché’s that run through fitness circles that I, as a recovering anti-exercise activist (I still hate gyms) used to alternate between mocking and merely ignoring.

But the other day as my DVD trainer (i.e. the trainer leading the way on my new exercise DVD), pointed out that stress is what strengthens our body; I realized that my friend’s sign had within it a kernel of truth. Pain is the weakness leaving the body, and stress is what we need to strengthen us.

Yes, there is good stress and bad stress and like anything in life such a thing as too much stress, but ultimately we tend to talk about stress as a bad thing when really, stress can be good. The stress of a Quarterlife Crisis for example can allows us to become stronger, more centered, more generous, more grounded human beings.

This isn’t a given.

Emotional stress can beat us down and take away our light, just like physical stress can lead to breaks, strains, sprains and other physical injuries.

For example, I recently caught a talk show episode about women with sleeping pill addictions. Most of these women had gone to the doctor with real sleep issues that had spiraled into a physical addiction spurred on by a complex of situation (insomnia) and poor handling by their doctors. Their emotional stress had led to well, more stress.

But watching them me realize how lucky I was that my own dalliance with insomnia led me not to addiction, but to a shift in habits. I’ve learned how to cope with stress through meditation, exercise, and a host of other positive behaviors that I’m sure will serve to help me in the future as I come into contact with more of life’s hiccups.

In other words, this round of emotional stress has made me a stronger human being.

I just haven’t been able to see it because of the pain that comes with it, much as we often don’t feel stronger in the days immediately after a tough workout because the strength is obscured by sore muscles.

Viewing emotional stress, not as a negative, but as a round of emotional weight lifting is an interesting shift in thinking and one that moves us from the role of Victim to Actor. And I for one find that this is a role that I may not relish but can more easily sink my teeth into.

That said, I’d still much rather lay on my couch with a pint of cookie dough ice cream in tow then deal with weight lifting: emotional or otherwise.

photo credit : lanraga

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The Meaning of “La Pura Vida”

posted 11th January 2010    Written by: Robyn    CATEGORY: All Posts, Quarterlife Crisis, Robyn, Season 1, Travel

In a lazy beach bar two men clink their beers together and say “La Pura Vida.” As I exit the local bus and thank the driver for the ride, he responds with, “La Pura Vida.” Even when locals can’t understand my Spanglish mixed with my Midwestern accent, they shrug their shoulders and reply, “La Pura Vida.”

It can be heard everywhere around Costa Rica. It means pure life, good life. I think I would compare it to the Australians’ use of “No worries.” Both phrases seem to acknowledge that life is good. There is no need to dwell on anything but the present moment and all that is sweet in life.

So what have I been doing? I started my travels in San Jose and from there moved on to Manuel Antonio. I hiked through Manuel Antonio National Park, saw monkeys, discovered a deserted beach, and I spent New Year’s Eve on the beach.

With a DJ mixing in the background, hundreds of people gathered to celebrate the New Year at a giant BYOB party that ended with fireworks and streaking into the ocean at midnight. It will be hard to ever top that kind of celebration!

From Manuel Antonio, I headed to Montezuma–the physical definition of “La Pura Vida.” Montezuma is a small hippie town on the beach. Everyone knows everyone, and they welcome travelers with open arms. People are known to plan a visit to Montezuma and instead, end up staying forever. The people who live there give new meaning to “laid back” and “stress-free.”

During my visit there, I stayed at a hostel right on the coast. I went to sleep to the sound of waves, and I woke up to the sound of waves. Each morning I hiked along the coast into town to get myself a smoothie for breakfast. After only a couple days, faces became familiar. I knew people’s stories. I knew where they lived, what they did for work, and how they ended up in Montezuma.

I decided I couldn’t leave after only a couple days, so I reorganized my trip to allow for a few extra days to be spent in Montezuma. I ended up doing a strenuous 4 hour coastal hike to a waterfall. I got to stand beneath the fresh water as it fell and hit the rocks and then rolled into the ocean.

I’ve spent most of my days soaking up sun, swimming in the ocean, attempting to body surf the crazy waves, and collecting seashells. I’ve enjoyed my fair share of reggae music and mojitos. I’ve tried each tiny restaurant in thee area, and I’ve tried to improve my Spanish as much as I can by talking to locals.

I’ve relaxed, cleared my mind, and become inspired by a new way of living.

Yesterday I decided it was time to move on, so now I am writing this blog from a café in Monteverde. In a couple hours I will be doing a canopy tour of the rainforest via zip line! I’m trying not to think of returning to the freezing Chicago weather…

Instead- I’m living in the moment and soaking up all that is La Pura Vida so that I can bring the attitude back with me.

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A New Year, A New Direction and New Hair

posted 6th January 2010    Written by: Andrea    CATEGORY: All Posts, Andrea, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

Six months ago, when I first started writing for Stratejoy I made a list of 30 things to do before I’m 30. I constantly consult it and through my time with Stratejoy, I have inched my way closer and closer to completing this list.

In 2009, I completed 4 things from last list and in 2010 I hope to do even more. Right off the bat, only a few days into the new year, I crossed off one of my most challenging things.

I cut my hair.

I have had long blond hair my entire life. I consider it almost like a superpower, because so few 20-somethings have long blond hair these days. Yesterday, I cut my hair off. I have never, ever had short hair and now I do. It’s like a piece of me is gone, its the strangest feeling!

In the car driving to the appointment I was freaking out, per usual when it comes to some sort of change in my life. (Over the past 6 months I’ve learned to handle most situations that give me anxiety, yes, but really what girl doesn’t freak out about her hair?)

The one thing that kept me focused was knowing no matter how it turned out, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. Change does not equal the end of the world.

People tend to associate change with terms like “scary” or “unknown.”  It doesn’t have to be that way. Change can be a good thing, and it usually is. Change is only what you make of it.

I have a feeling 2010 its going to be a great year of change. For me, I started it off with a physical change and my hair! I’m also applying for a Doctoral program, so that will most definitely be a mental challenge and change. Finally, even though I won’t officially be part of Stratejoy in the coming year, I hope to continue to write on my own, practice reflection and yoga and work my way through this Quarterlife Crisis in my own spiritual way.

My theme for 2010 is Keep Calm and Carry On.

Happy New Year QuarterLifers! What changes lie ahead for you?

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Letting Go is the Goal

posted 5th January 2010    Written by: Kendra    CATEGORY: All Posts, Kendra, Life Lesson, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

For months now only one thought has propelled me forward: 2010.

I have wanted to put the general crappiness of 2009 in my rearview mirror since at least August.

Consequently, I’ve spent a lot of December preparing for the tweenies aka 2010.

I went through box after box of my stuff in storage and weeded out the things I no longer needed, culling from an ever dwindling amount of stuff.

I gave books and clothes to charity, stepped up my meditation practice, took several cleansing bath, enacted a solstice ritual, went belly dancing (whoops that was just for fun), saw a reiki healer (an interesting experience), and even dabbled with the thought of returning to my Catholic roots and going to confession.

Except I couldn’t figure out what to confess, `cause yep I’m just that angelic.

And now, just a handful of days into 2010 guess what? Nothing’s changed. I’ve manifested no miracles. I’m still at the same temp job, still putting in hours of ‘I thought I’d outgrown this’ retail work, still coasting on my parents couch and feeling the deep sting of disappointment that comes from yet  another round of employment rejection.

So, for 2010 I’ve made loads of private resolutions, but the one I’m willingly to publicly state is that my goal of for 2010 is to let go.

Let go of what?

Of everything. Of the person that I used to be and the person that I’d thought I’d become, of the job that I thought I’d have, of the way I believed I’d be living, of the people that I thought I’d be sharing my life with.

Because none of that is where I am right now and focusing on that, on what I wanted instead of what I have, is just making me feel worse.

So instead, I’m just going to get very still and very quiet and let life unfurl itself before me. It’s going to do so regardless.

photo credit

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