Category: Doniree

“I think I’ll move to Australia” (how to get through bad days)

posted 16th November 2010    Written by: Doniree    CATEGORY: Creativity, Doniree, Inspiration, Life Lesson, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 3, Tips & Tools

You read that book when you were younger, right?  Remember Alexander, and his “terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day”?  I’d forgotten about that book until I was babysitting sometime last summer and re-read that book, and I thought of how I could actually identify with this kid.  ”I think I’ll move to Australia” sounds like my kind of coping mechanism!

Except that Real Life doesn’t work that way, and we’re not characters in a children’s book (or are we?).  As adults (or almost-adults, or I’m-not-yet-admitting-I’m-an-adult adults, or I’m-still-sorting-through-my-Quarter-Life-Crisis adults), we’ve got to put a few things in place in order to get ourselves through, and then out of bad days – from the kind-of bad days to the EPIC , curling-iron-burns-drank-bad-milk-got-a-parking-ticket-NOTHING-IS-GOING-RIGHT bad days.

I wouldn’t say each of these are foolproof all the time, but I can just about always figure out the right combination of tactics for getting myself out of a funk, or for turning what seems like a serious of unfortunate and unlucky events – upside down.

Here’s what I keep in my arsenal to attack those inconvenienty bad days:

What works for you?  Do you hash it out with your friends, or internalize it all and process it yourself?


{Photo credit: @christopherdan}

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5 Things I Believe About Spirit, Soul, and Faith

posted 9th November 2010    Written by: Doniree    CATEGORY: Doniree, Inspiration, Season 3, Spirituality, What I've Learned

Southern Baptist childhood.  One year in a Jesuit Catholic university.  Friends of all faiths.  A year in a hippie-like, yoga-fied, meditating near-mountain town.  Spirituality.  I’ve had a lot of religion in my life, largely Western influences, Christianity, prayer, repentance, and judgment.

In the last year or two I have identified much more with a broader worldview, more similar to Eastern religions, but not identifying as Buddhist, Taoist, or Hindu.  I’m learning, exploring.  Exposing myself to new world views since as a youngin’, I was simply taught that everything else was wrong, but never really understood what “everything else” meant.

I also know that it’s tough for me to discuss religion and spirituality sometimes, as I don’t want to imply that my practice is the right practice or that one idea trumps another.  I don’t know that – I don’t have the authority to say that.  But I know what works for me, I know what resonates.  I know what keeps me grounded, what keeps me connected to my world.  I’ve boiled some of what I do know down to a series of simple, straight-forward beliefs.  These are a few of those:

  1. I believe in love and kindness.
  2. I believe that religion doesn’t make you spiritual and spirituality doesn’t make you religious.
  3. I believe in a higher power and in Divinity, and I believe that that Divinity is present in all beings.
  4. I believe that yoga, meditation, clarity, self/Self-awareness, and intention are crucial in my own spiritual practice.
  5. I believe that I don’t know everything.

I don’t believe in religions that teach love and kindness but don’t exude it.  I don’t like labels, but would rather see evidence of faith and love that comes from within.  I believe that ideas and acts like prayer and putting it out in the Universe are synonymous and reflect our different perceptions of what God means and who God is, and that neither of those things take away from the presence of Divinity.  I believe that I connect with my spirit and soul through yoga, Svādhyāya (self-study), relationships with others, and my relationship with the earth and my world.

I believe that this is where I’m at after decades of an upbringing in church, a few years of a dedicated yoga practice, and an attempt to reconcile the two, think critically about the two, and discern what I can and can’t accept.  I believe that yoga isn’t sacrilegious and that pastors who have been saying that yoga is the devil’s work are total whack jobs.  I believe that there is plenty more to learn and that as someone who is a seeker, that I will continue to learn and that the more I learn the more I will realize how much more there is to discover.

I believe that I love this journey.

What do you believe and how did you get there?

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Where I Find Inspiration

posted 2nd November 2010    Written by: Doniree    CATEGORY: Doniree, Inspiration, Season 3

Pretty much ninety percent of the time, I’ve got a notebook and a pen with me.  The other 10% when I don’t have a physical pen and paper, I have the Notebook app and Evernote apps on my phone on the front/main screen of my iPhone, and they’re constantly being filled with ideas and jotted notes.

Inspiration hits at the most random times.  On my yoga mat’s a given.  Half-pigeon pose?  I’m dealing with feelings, emotions, and creativity.  Ideas run like crazy.  Final savasana?  Sometimes I transcend.  Other times I make grocery lists.  It really depends on the day, but just about demands that somewhere within my reach after class ends, I have a way to write down the epiphanies I had or the acorn squash I need to pick up at Safeway.

I also have really great ideas in the shower.  There’s something about being alone with your thoughts – no texting, no email alerts, no nothing except for cleansing steam, soap, hot water, and firing connections in my brain.

It’s pretty reliable that if I shower regularly and stick with my yoga practice, my mind stays fairly fresh and balanced, generating new ideas and connecting new thoughts all the time.

Except when it doesn’t.  And when I’m stuck, when I’m at a dead end, feeling uninspired, running up against the dreaded writer’s block, and staring at a blank computer screen or note book page – I have a few things in my arsenal that I pull out when I need to be inspired.

Here’s what I do when I need to kickstart creativity:

Do

Switch up my routine.  Take a different bus, work in a different coffee shop, go to a new yoga class.  Visit the gym at a different time of day than usual, try a new place for lunch.  Cook something new.  Do something that requires my brain to make new connections, try on new perspectives.

Cook.  There is something so incredibly therapeutic about cooking.  I love cooking for and with friends, but when I need to unplug and completely reconnect to me, I cook for me.  I concentrate on chopping vegetables, measuring tablespoons, waiting for oil to heat.  I turn garlic and onions carefully in the skillet, and study the contents of my cabinets and refrigerator for the right combination of flavors for the food that’s cooking.  I kitchen dance. I nourish my body, whether that means paying careful attention to get a ton of nutrients and vitamins in my system or if it means sinking into a rich, creamy bowl of soup or pasta.  Sometimes Doniree’s Test Kitchen works out well, and I come up with delicious meals that demand replication, and I share them with friends.  Sometimes it doesn’t work out so well and I toss more than I keep.  But it’s about the process as much as it’s about the flavors.  The process of learning what does and doesn’t work, and the process of such active participation in what I put into my body.  For me, there are fewer more reconnecting and inspiring acts than conscious cooking.

Hear

French Cafe music on Pandora.  When I need to write, I work well when I’m working with music that either doesn’t have words, or doesn’t have words in English.  If I can’t sing along, I focus more on what I’m doing.  Also, French music in general makes me daydreamy and romantic-feeling, so inspiration’s nearly a given.  Just try not to be inspired listening to Carla Bruni, eating croissants, and pretending you’re actually in a French cafe.  Just try.

Other [Mostly] Chick Music. Feist.  Florence and the Machines.  Lissie.  La Roux.  Yeah Yeah Yeahs.  Metric.  Karen O doing just about anything.  Taylor Swift.  The Weepies.  You get the idea.

Connect

Process. The people in my life are brilliant, smart, deep, spiritual, critical-thinking, bright lights of inspiration.  My boyfriend keeps me on my toes and holds me accountable to truly living what I believe in.  My girlfriends are radiant women who are authentic and honest.  Others in my life are motivated, smart, and inspiring.  Being in the presence of – and actively contributing to – relationships and conversation is a huge source of inspiration in my life.  They ask thought-provoking questions, hold me accountable to never being anything less than my most authentic self, and create a safe space for hashing out tough thoughts and feelings.

Surrender.  Admitting I’m stuck and surrendering to the void, to the unknown, to the frustration is typically when inspiration strikes the hardest.  I’m frequently held accountable to this idea and remind me to stop fighting the lack of inspiration and motivation and surrender into whatever the blockage is.  Surrendering is typically a sure-fire way to find the answers and ideas I’d previously been fighting so hard to find.

Move

Run, walk, stretch, twist, asana.  It’s no surprise, but getting physical is inspiring.  I run a couple of times a week at the gym, and typically listen to a podcast or upbeat music while I do.  Sometimes I listen to what’s on my iPod, sometimes I listen to what’s in my head.  Either way, the act of unplugging and hanging with you and your own body – within your own body – is really inspiring.  On top of that, I get to yoga at least a couple of times each week (my goal for November is 3-4 times/week).  I can’t sing loud enough the praises of what this practice does for connecting mind, body, and spirit.

These are a few of the things that work for me. What works for you?

{Photo credit: Rachel at Hello Gorgeous Photography}

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Halfway

posted 26th October 2010    Written by: Doniree    CATEGORY: Doniree, Inspiration, Job/Career/Work, Life Lesson, Love/Relationships, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 3, What I've Learned

half moonI asked Chelsea what came to mind when I said the word “halfway” or “half,” seeing as we’re now halfway through this third guest blogging season here at Stratejoy.  Her response?

“House?”

Ok… so maybe that’s not the idea I was going for.  I was thinking halfway points, halftime shows, even Halfway, Oregon (yes, that’s really a city – I checked).  But halfway?  As in, I’ve written half the amount of posts I’ll write here this season?  That’s exciting and a little sad – I don’t want it to end!

Chelsea and I started ruminating a bit on the general idea of “halfway,” and she suggested that the existence of a halfway point signifies an end – which, in the case of my contributions to this blog – there is an end.  We’ve committed to so many weeks and that has a number and we’re halfway to that number.  But, in general – in life - we’re in a constant state of movement, moving forward, transition even.  Yeah, there’s technically an “end date” (morbid, yeah), but we don’t know it and so “halfway” is kind of arbitrary in the great big scheme of things.

However, when there is an end date or time, or a goal with numbers and steps that can be defined – halfway is kind of a big deal.  Halfway through my workout motivates me to keep working, to push a little harder until I reach my goal.  Halfway through a task on my to-do list ramps me up and makes me want to just blaze through the rest.  It’s motivating.  It’s exciting.

In this case, it’s crazy.  Really?!  Halfway?!  It’s motivating and energizing yes, but I don’t want it to end!

Blogging for Stratejoy this season has been an incredible commitment and experience.  Commitment, yes because even when I’m not keeping up with my own blog, I’ve committed to being here and showing up for you.  And I’ve loved to share my stories and hear from amazing new voices and hearts that have offered some really awesome insight along the way.  It’s been awesome to have a writing commitment that’s focused (we have topics! and deadlines!), but that’s personal.  It’s wonderful to share my stories and find so many kindred spirits who relate to thoughts and ideas I’ve shared.

So… halfway through, let me just say THANK YOU for listening and for showing up here with me.  I’m excited for the second half, the next part, and for learning more about myself along the way.  We’ve covered a lot in the first half, haven’t we?

I mean, we met way back in August and I talked about the overwhelming confusion that comes with realizing I could actually have and do anything I wanted… so then what was I supposed to do?  Hello, Quarter-Life Crisis.

It’s helpful to have a little background, so I spent the next couple of weeks talking about my history with ad agencies and media buying, move to freelancing and contract work, and my move across the country from Minnesota to Colorado.

Digging a little deeper, I talked about how I fell in love when I wasn’t expecting to and how I believe that relationships in our life are on a collision course – we find who we need when we need them, right?  Honestly, this was one of my favorite posts so far this season.

I explained how my background in homeschooling helped teach me to teach myself and be one of those self-starter kind of people that – as a freelancer – not only appreciates being able to work on her own schedule, but is learning that the same model in school of “work til you’re done” holds true in the working world.  That lesson was born out of learning that when you can work anytime, it’s sometimes easy to work all the time and I finally started to explore finding that balance.

I talked about debt and money issues and how our tastes and interests change over time, covered friendships and the rituals that surround those, and talked about brilliant joy and its presence in my life.  More recently, I talked about fear and subsequently what might happen when you throw that fear out the window.

Today, I’m reflecting.  Looking back at how much I’ve shared and excited about the second half – about peeling back another layer and moving forward.  Halfway.  Can you believe that?

I’m just curious… what’s been your favorite post so far?  What else do you want to know about me?  What can I keep in mind moving forward into the second half of this season?


{photo credit}

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If you knew you could not fail

posted 19th October 2010    Written by: Doniree    CATEGORY: Creativity, Doniree, Inspiration, Job/Career/Work, Season 3, What I've Learned

“What would you attempt to do, if you knew you could not fail?”

I saw this quote written on the chalkboard behind the counter at a Starbucks in Minneapolis.  I think I remember the Starbucks.  I think it was the one at Excelsior and Grand, and I think I’d met a girlfriend there that night for coffee.  I remember I had been considering a move – I was close to the end of yoga teacher training, and my world was opening up in ways I’d never imagined.  I was weeks away from a goal and a dream I’d set years before – be certified to teach yoga.  I was starting to contemplate another dream I’d had from years before – live a number of different places for a little while at a time, learning and loving my way through new cities.

I also knew I wanted to work from home (or coffeeshops, or the road).  I wanted to write, to help, and to create, and I wanted to do so outside of the 9-5 timeframe.  I wanted to allow myself to be creative when I felt creative and to be productive when I felt productive – knowing that an 8-hour work day did not equal the most productivity, just the most hours.  And I don’t believe in putting in a lot of hours to look busy.  I want to be busy, and then be done.

I was starting to feel like this was the right time, but I was scared.  I was nervous about my ability as a yoga teacher, and I was nervous about leaving the comforts and familiarity of friends and family in Minnesota.  I was outlining my life and where I wanted it to go and it included: teach yoga, move around, write a lot, know and love amazing people.

What would you attempt to do if you knew you could not fail?

I remember the coffee shop, and I remember the quote.  And I remember almost immediately answering, “I’d quit my job, turn this freelance idea into something real, pack up my life, and move across the country.”

And somewhere in that moment, I started to feel the exhilaration that comes with making a decision and knowing in your gut that it’s the right one.  I did quit my job, I have learned how to freelance full-time, I did pack up my life and fit most of it into a Nissan Murano, and I did move from Minneapolis, Minnesota to Boulder, Colorado in January of this year.

And here we are again – on the cusp of new opportunities and ideas.  I haven’t started teaching yoga, but I’m committing to doing so by the end of the year.  I have ideas about what I want to be doing with my life, how I want to be spending my days, and I find myself towing the line between “dream” and “do”.  I’m really, really close.  Again.

So today, this day in October, I find myself asking the same question I did that night in Minnesota:

What would I attempt to do if I knew I could not fail?

Teach yoga.  Start writing a book.  Start teaching skills and ideas that I’m always asked about yet for some reason doubt my expertise on the subject.  Stop doubting the things I know well.  Stay healthy.  Sell my stationary and scarves in an Etsy shop.  Decorate a beautiful apartment.  Make homemade truffles (with a recipe from Nicole).  Earn a life coaching certificate.  Study Spanish again. Eat locally, sustainably, and organically as much as possible.  Live in Europe.  Grow my own herbs.  Simplify my life aka own fewer things.  Be able to pick up and pack up at a moments’ notice, grab an Airstream and leave on an indefinite road trip.  Drive a motorcycle.  Cross more items off my Life List.  Teach.  Never stop living out loud.

What would YOU do, if you knew you could not fail?

{Photo credit – card photo above.  Beach feet thumbnail is my own.}

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