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Quarterlife Crisis Anyone?

posted 1st March 2010    Written by: Katie    CATEGORY: All Posts, Inspiration, Katie, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 2, What I've Learned

I’m the exception to every rule.

No, I’m serious. Every. Single. Rule.

As women, we are expected to be emotional, prepared, successful, happy creatures who know exactly what we want and how to get it. I don’t know who created these expectations, but I want them shot, or at least put through a super-scientific experiment where we inject their lives with the Quarterlife Crisis.

When I heard about Stratejoy, I was, I’d say, 430% skeptical. I had bought every self help book there is to buy from every bookstore on the east coast. I spent countless hours sitting in my room, reading through books that tried to tell me how to get out of the slump that I was in based on other people’s experiences.

I don’t know if it’s me, but relating to others who have nothing in common with me just doesn’t work.

Before I committed to doing the Stratejoy Joy Equation program, and long before I applied to be a guest blogger, I decided to look into it a little bit more. I wanted to find the loophole where it said that the program was not for me. Maybe it was just for professional women;  Or married women;  Or women who knew what they wanted; None of which described me at all.

So… I read a few of the blog posts by Molly and her group of  Season One bloggers.

At one point, I had to get up and walk away from my computer.  Who were these women? How did they know exactly how I was feeling? You mean, I’m not a freak of nature? It was in that moment that I was sold on the idea of giving the program a try. If nothing else, to prove Molly wrong. To prove that there was someone out there that this program wouldn’t work for.

It might sound like I was being a bit negative – and I was.

When you go through a bunch of disappointments in life,  you learn not to expect too much from anyone or anything. I didn’t want to expect a life changing experience from Stratejoy, not get it, and be eternally depressed that I am truly a freak of nature who can’t be helped.

But I did it.

Within 3 hours, I had my first e-mail from Molly. A welcoming ‘hello’ and the very first writing assignment. I buzzed right through it, and waiting patiently for the next day. It was one of the first few assignments that knocked me out of the water and changed the way I looked at things forever. I was asked to recall the last time I was truly happy, and to describe how I felt.

Easy, right? For most people, sure. But not for me, not the exception to the rule. I realized after 30 minutes of steady thought cramming that I wasn’t able to remember when I was happy. Or how I felt when I was happy. Or anything with the word happy in it. Except Happy Gilmore. Awesome movie.

It was in that moment that I made the realization that I don’t pay enough attention to the moments in which I’m happy, and I focus a lot on the negative. This was a powerful thing for me to realize, and since that revelation, I’ve focused a lot more on living in the moment and being totally open to all of my emotions, especially happiness.

And that realization came on the third or fourth day. I still had 20+ days to go.

The Stratejoy program was a month filled with laughter, tears, life decisions, and mending. All of my life questions weren’t answered at the end of the program, but I do feel like I know what I want next, and how I need to go about doing it.  I had made a new friend in Molly, who when she called me for our “Jam Session”, was easier to talk to than I had ever imagined.

The other day I was talking with a friend and we got to the game of “20 Questions”. He asked me what person inspired me most in 2010. I answered a proud, “Molly Hoyne. Because her Joy Equation helped me find myself underneath the years of pain, frustration, and fear. I now wake up and am excited to spend the day with myself. That says a lot for someone who hated her skin for years.”

He replied; “So really, your most inspiring person is yourself.”

Touche, Friend. Touche.

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Almost Back to Normal

posted 5th November 2009    Written by: Marisa    CATEGORY: All Posts, Inspiration, Marisa, Quarterlife Crisis, Season 1

Marisa ponderingHey guys, guess what.  I got a job.

After my months of searching, trying to find an employment path or road to ride along, a job just kind of snuck up on me and smacked me hello.  And it’s what I’ve been looking for, so I can still continue to pursue music and other creative efforts.

So, I have a job, that’s a huge relief, right?  I’m all okay?

Somewhat yes.  Working for lucy activewear will alleviate some of my worries and trouble.  Financially, the steady paycheck is much appreciated and a self-confidence/identity will return with work.  Yes, I have missed those.

But I think I’m wary and still unsure because my Quarterlife Crisis was bigger than just unemployment.  I started to question and learn new things about myself and the process isn’t even close to being over…  That’s why my experience with Molly’s online course “The Joy Equation” has been an interesting one.

To focus on oneself, I find, is a scary thing.  I do have confidence about myself whether it’s physical or emotional, but it’s fleeting at times and doesn’t tend to stick around whenever I need it.  And to reflect about whom I am and how I feel about myself is thus scary.

This experiment of exploring who I am and what I want has been very telling for the past 30 days.

In a lot of instances, I know who I am.  I know what I like, what I dislike and how I like things in life.  I do know, however, that I’m not finished yet with finding out who the complete Marisa is.  That’s what this QLC is all about for me at least.

My favorite part of the course is the three-minute questions.  For example, there are questions that focus on what you cherish, what you can accomplish or what you can commit and realize.  I have scattered thoughts and ideas and this helped immensely to concentrate and divide what’s realistic and what’s not.

I actually enjoyed being able to read a plan of sorts for my upcoming future; the ability to see a path written on paper gives me hope and confidence that I’ll find whatever it is that I’m looking for, need or want.  I’m getting to the point where I can recognize what’s going to make my life and myself happy.

So, I have a job again.  I admit, I am excited.  The people at lucy seem just unbelievable nice and relaxed and calm.  I think I’m going to like this.

But I know I’m still figuring other parts of my life out. I’m still learning more and more about myself. Tools like this blog, Stratejoy and The Joy Equation have given me some direction as to how to do it and how to like what I find.

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photo credit: Nilina Mason-Campbell

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